conflict
Family Journey

Behind Closed Doors: How to Turn Conflict into Strength

by Denise Wright

In Part 1, we discussed the pressures of constant togetherness. Part 2 tackled the impacts of overstimulation, while Part 3 focused on managing the friction that comes with living, working, and parenting under one roof. But now, let’s shift gears and talk about the silver lining—the growth that comes from navigating conflict. Because, believe it or not, conflict doesn’t have to be a relationship killer. In fact, it can actually help you grow stronger as a couple, if you let it.

Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, and in our house, it feels like it’s almost inevitable. But as we’ve learned over time, how we handle the conflict matters far more than the conflict itself. It’s easy to get caught up in the heat of the moment and let frustration or miscommunication drive a wedge between us, but the truth is, those moments of tension don’t have to define us. Instead, they can be opportunities to deepen our connection and strengthen our understanding of each other.

Turning Conflict into Connection

One of the biggest lessons we’ve learned, and perhaps are still learning, is that conflict can be an opportunity for understanding. When friction arises, it’s easy to see it as a sign of failure, like something is wrong with the relationship. But the reality is, it’s just part of the process. Every time we argue, we learn something new about ourselves and each other. We start to recognize patterns in our communication, discover the things that trigger us, and learn how to respond better in the future.

Take that time when Matt and I had the whole “Ethan didn’t get in trouble because I didn’t hear him” situation. It could’ve been just another fight that left us frustrated and distant. But we chose to dig deeper. Instead of just arguing, we took a moment to pause and reflect on why we were reacting the way we were. I realized that it wasn’t just about what happened in the moment—it was about feeling overstimulated, stressed, and unable to communicate effectively. Once we recognized that, we were able to see the situation through a different lens. And just like that, a fight turned into a moment of growth and understanding.

Communication: The Key to Avoiding Conflict

It’s no surprise that communication is the key to turning conflict into growth. It’s the cornerstone of every strong relationship. But, let’s be real—communication doesn’t always come easily. Especially when you’re both overstimulated or frustrated. It can feel like every word out of your mouth is a potential landmine. But even when things are heated, we’ve learned that taking a step back and communicating calmly can prevent the friction from escalating.

When we’re in the middle of a disagreement, we recognize that it could be helpful to start checking in with each other. Asking questions like, “What’s really bothering you here?” or “How can I help?” could be a great way to shift the focus from winning the argument to understanding each other’s perspectives. I’ll admit, we don’t always do this—but I can see how it would make a huge difference in navigating conflict. It’s not always easy (sometimes it feels like trying to speak two different languages), but this approach could help us connect better, especially when emotions are running high.

Humility and Apologizing: The Secret to Healing

Another key lesson we’re learning is the importance of humility in conflict. I’m not talking about being a doormat, but about recognizing when you’ve been wrong or when your actions have contributed to the friction. For me, this has been a huge eye-opener. Growing up, I wasn’t exactly taught conflict resolution skills, and I was surrounded by people who didn’t often acknowledge when they were wrong or apologize. As a result, I didn’t always see the value in owning up to my mistakes. Over time, though, I’ve learned that taking responsibility doesn’t make me weak—it actually makes me stronger. It’s a sign of maturity and growth in the relationship.

Matt and I are both guilty of letting our pride get in the way sometimes. But we’ve learned that swallowing our pride and offering a sincere apology can go a long way in healing the hurt and rebuilding the bond. When I’ve messed up, I now make a conscious effort to apologize and take responsibility. And when Matt does the same, I’m reminded that we’re in this together—not as opponents, but as a team. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it.

Laughing Through the Tension

Now, I know we’ve been talking about heavy stuff, but here’s the good news—laughter can be a great tool for easing the tension during conflict. As intense as things can get, sometimes we just need to stop, take a deep breath, and laugh at how ridiculous we’re being. If we’ve argued about something silly—like the TV remote, or who left the laundry on the floor again—it helps to take a step back and laugh at ourselves.

Looking Ahead: Continuing to Grow Together

The bottom line is that conflict doesn’t have to tear us apart. If we approach it with humility, patience, and a commitment to understanding, it can bring us closer together. Conflict and friction are inevitable in any relationship, but how we handle them can either strengthen or weaken the bond we share. We’re still learning, still growing, and still figuring it out as we go, but with each disagreement, we grow stronger, more connected, and more resilient as a couple.

In the next post, we’ll wrap up this series by sharing the lessons we’ve learned about navigating life’s challenges together. We’ll talk about how we’re continuing to grow as a family, how we deal with conflict on a daily basis, and how we make space for joy—even in the middle of the chaos.

overstimulation
Family Journey

Behind Closed Doors: How to Manage Friction at Home

by Denise Wright

Part 3: Managing Friction Without Letting It Define You

In Part 1, we talked about the pressures of constant togetherness, and in Part 2, we explored how overstimulation can lead to all kinds of stress. But now, let’s get into the heart of the matter: friction. You know, those moments where the small stuff turns into big stuff, and suddenly, you’re arguing over who left the socks in the hallway like it’s the end of the world. We’ve all been there, right?!

Friction is inevitable in any relationship, especially when you’re living, working, and homeschooling together under the same roof 24/7. It’s like having a constant buzz of static in the background that only gets louder when everything else is stressful. But here’s the good news: even though friction happens, it doesn’t have to control us. We can handle it without letting it define our relationship.

Recognizing the Source of Friction (It’s Not the Socks)

The first thing we’ve learned is that recognizing the source of friction is crucial. And no, it’s not the socks—although sometimes it sure feels like it! The truth is, the small things that set us off are usually just the tip of the iceberg. It’s not about the missing TV remote or who forgot to take out the trash; it’s usually a buildup of everything else—the overstimulation, the stress of work, and the lack of personal space.

For example, that fight over the lens wipes? It wasn’t about the lens wipes. It was about the fact that we’ve both been running on empty, and suddenly, that little inconvenience was the final straw. We’ve had to remind ourselves that friction often comes from the build-up of everything we’re not addressing. The key is realizing that before it explodes into something bigger than it needs to be.

Communicating Through the Friction (Before It Turns into World War III)

friction

One of the hardest lessons I’ve learned is that when the friction heats up, communication is the best tool to diffuse it. If we’re not careful, frustration can build so quickly that we start snapping at each other over things that don’t really matter. Take the time I was playing with Ethan, being silly, and singing along to a song to make him laugh. I had my headphones in, dancing away, when suddenly Addison started getting obnoxiously loud in the other room. Ethan, of course, yelled at her to “shut up,” which led me to get onto him. I was frustrated because he could’ve handled it better.

Well, some time passed, and the same thing happened again, but this time I didn’t hear Ethan yell. Matt, who was trying to work from the other room, came into the kitchen to get on to Ethan about it. Later, Matt asked me why I hadn’t said anything to Ethan. I told him that I had, but in reality, I hadn’t. I just wasn’t thinking clearly after already being overstimulated and stressed from a previous disagreement with Matt which led me to getting defensive.

Admitting You Messed Up is Hard Sometimes

Matt kept asking why I hadn’t gotten onto Ethan, and eventually, I admitted that I hadn’t heard him that time. It seemed simple enough, but instead of just letting it go, we found ourselves in a back-and-forth argument over something that should’ve been a quick fix. And just like that, what started as a silly, lighthearted moment of play quickly spiraled into frustration.

This is where communication becomes crucial—especially when we’re both overstimulated. Instead of letting our frustrations take over, we have to learn to slow down and talk about how we’re feeling. It’s not always easy, but saying something like, “I’m really overwhelmed, can we hit pause for a second?” helps us reset before we start going at each other like we’re in a boxing ring.

Confessing My Faults

I’ll be the first to admit it: I’m really bad at communicating—about 90% of the time. Whether in calm moments or heated ones, sometimes the words that come out of my mouth aren’t even close to what I meant to say. If I can’t rehearse what I want to say beforehand, it’s almost guaranteed that I’ll end up in a jumbled mess of words and probably trouble. Take, for example, a time I testified at a church event. What I meant to express was that I felt thankful, despite never seeing myself as a pastor’s wife. I wanted to say that God had given me a burden for the souls He’d entrusted to us.

What came out, though? Well, apparently it sounded very different. Members later told me that they interpreted my testimony as if I was saying they were a burden. Talk about a facepalm moment. I honestly wish I’d rehearsed what I wanted to say because, like I said, if I don’t prepare beforehand, I might as well stay silent. It’s definitely left me a little timid about impulsive public speaking, so if I ever seem quiet—yeah, that’s probably why.

What Was I Saying…?

When it comes to communicating how I feel or what I think, my thoughts rarely come out the way I mean them, which gets me into trouble more often than not. This is also why blogging comes so much easier to me—because I can sit down, type out my thoughts, and meticulously go over them until they make sense. In person, though? Not so much. I’ve learned that my memory is awful most of the time, so I’ll say something—or even type something—and then forget where I was going with it. This happens all the time, and I mean all the time.

Take, for example, my recent trip to the salon. I was telling my stylist about how my grandfather’s hair went completely white in his twenties. Well, that was my point, anyway. I started talking, and then suddenly went completely blank. I just looked at her and said, “I forgot what I was saying,” and then, thankfully, she reminded me, and I was able to finish my thought. It’s bad, y’all.

Setting Boundaries to Prevent Escalation (Taking a “Break” Doesn’t Mean Giving Up)

When the friction gets too much to handle, we’ve found it’s important to set some boundaries. And by boundaries, I mean taking a break. I know, I know—it sounds like we’re avoiding the problem, but actually, giving ourselves a break helps us address the issue without letting it spiral out of control.

When Matt and I hit that boiling point, we’ve learned that it’s okay to say, “Let’s take some time and come back to this.” Whether that means stepping outside, grabbing a quick coffee, or locking ourselves in the bathroom for a moment of peace (I’m not above that), a little distance can do wonders. It gives us time to calm down, think clearly, and avoid saying things we’ll regret.

Keeping the Big Picture in Mind (It’s Not the End of the World)

Finally, we’ve learned that it’s essential to keep the big picture in mind when the friction is at its peak. In the heat of the moment, it feels like the whole world is falling apart, but when we take a step back, we realize that it’s just a bump in the road. We aren’t actually each others enemy. This is just something we need to slow down and work through.

I’ll be the first to admit how easy that sounds when everything is currently smooth sailing. And I’d probably roll my eyes at hearing that said to me when I’m in the middle of those kinds of moments. I’m in a work in progress. And I do love and appreciate my husband deeply.

I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had arguments that felt like the end of the world, only to laugh about it later. The small annoyances, the miscommunications, and the little things that cause friction? They’re just part of living together. The key is not to let them define us. We’ve learned to remind each other that our relationship is built on love and trust, and those small issues don’t take away from that.

Looking Ahead: Turning Friction into Growth

In the next post, Part 4: Growing Stronger Through Conflict, we’ll dive into how conflict and friction can actually strengthen our relationship if we handle it the right way. We’ll share the tools we’ve learned to turn these moments of tension into opportunities for growth, understanding, and better communication. It’s not always easy, but with patience and a little humor, we’re learning how to handle it all together.

overstimulation
Family Foundations

Behind Closed Doors: How to Handle Overstimulation

by Denise Wright

Part 2: How to Handle Overstimulation

In Part 2, we’re diving into how overstimulation —whether from parenting, work, or the constant demands of daily life—can impact our relationships. We’ll also share what we’re doing to handle it (spoiler alert: it’s not always pretty). If you’ve been following the series, you know that in Part 1, we explored the pressures of constant togetherness and the friction it creates in our relationships. If you haven’t read it yet, I highly recommend starting there. It will help you understand the foundation of the tension we’re navigating as a family.

The Impact it Has On Relationships

Ever feel like your nerves are about to short-circuit? Either by the endless demands of parenting, working from home, and balancing everything else? You’re definitely not alone. Overstimulation is the real deal, and when it hits, it feels like you’re constantly running on empty. For Matt and me, this is all too familiar. We both get overwhelmed by the sheer volume of life happening around us. Before we know it, small annoyances turn into big problems—think “snapping over the missing TV remote” level problems.

When we’re overstimulated, everything feels like it’s turned up to 11. I’m talking about that moment when you feel like you’re about to lose it. Like just one more interruption will make you burst into a thousand tiny pieces. It’s not that spending the entire day with Matt is the issue—honestly, we could be together all day and it would be totally fine. The problem is when everyone else in the house interrupts our flow. Interruptions are fine, but when you’re overstimulated, even the smallest disruption feels like the last straw.

The Breaking Point: When Small Things Turn into Big Problems

overstimulation

When overstimulation takes over, it’s like your whole world shifts in an instant. One minute, you’re fine, and the next, you’re mentally screaming, “I CAN’T DO ONE MORE THING!” You’re trying to focus on a task, and then bam—the kids are fighting over who gets to be what character in a game, or someone needs something right now. Suddenly, your mind feels like it’s short-circuiting. The constant noise, the interruptions, the endless to-do list—it all builds up, and before you know it, you’ve snapped. And then, of course, you feel like a jerk for reacting the way you did, but sometimes it’s just too much.

Real Life Examples of Overstimulated Parents

And Matt? He’s in the same boat. When we’re both running on empty, even the simplest exchanges quickly turn into big arguments. For example, I ask him to pass me a couple of lens wipes while he’s working. When I hear what sounds like frustration in his sigh, I automatically assume he’s irritated. I snap, “Never mind, I’ll figure it out myself.” He responds, “You didn’t even give me a chance to respond!” Small things spiral out of control when we’re both overstimulated.

Then there’s the time Matt’s been dealing with the kids arguing all day. I finally get them to bed, only for others in the house to bring more issues our way—things that aren’t ours to solve. I ask, “Is there anything I can do to help?” but before he can fully express how overwhelmed he feels, I interrupt, trying to correct him. “It’s not like that, Matt.” Naturally, that makes things worse. He says, “I can’t even tell you how I’m feeling without you telling me why I shouldn’t feel that way.” When both of us are overstimulated and running on fumes, the miscommunication snowballs into something much bigger than it needs to be.

Recognizing When You’ve Hit Your Limit with Overstimulation

It’s tricky to recognize when you’re overstimulated. It’s like that moment in a TV show when a character faces an intense situation, and you realize you’ve been holding your breath. Then, you suddenly gasp for air—thinking it will help, even though it doesn’t. The problem is, you didn’t even realize you were holding your breath. When we’re both overstimulated, we often forget to pause and check in with each other. Instead, we try to power through, thinking, “We just need to get through this.” But the reality is, we’re both reaching our limits. Instead of addressing it, we push on—and that’s when things start to spiral.

The best way we’ve found to deal with overstimulation is to hit pause. I know, easier said than done, but we’ve learned we have to recognize it before it explodes. When we feel overwhelmed, we need to communicate that. Even if it’s just saying, “I’m about to lose my mind, can we take a quick break?”. It’s not a perfect system, but recognizing when we’re overstimulated before things spiral has helped us more times than I can count.

Where it gets us in trouble is when we acknowledge it and don’t pause because we are right in the middle of a pressing issue or at least it feels pressing because we’ve been trying to accomplish that one thing for hours now.

How We’re Managing Overstimulation

So, how do we manage overstimulation when life keeps coming at us fast? Well, it’s not magic, but here’s what’s been working (and by “working,” I mean it helps most days, but it’s definitely still a learning process):

  • Setting Boundaries for Downtime: We’ve started setting clear boundaries around when we need quiet time. This might mean one of us takes a walk alone or just spends 15 minutes in a room by themselves to unwind. Even a short break can reset our brains and help us think clearly. I’m not saying a full spa day (though that would be nice), just a quick breather so we don’t go completely bonkers.
  • Checking in with Each Other: Communication is key! We try to ask each other how we’re doing throughout the day. Are we both feeling overwhelmed? Do we need to divide up responsibilities? A simple check-in goes a long way in preventing one of us from blowing up over something small (like the fact that the laundry basket is too full—again).
  • Taking Small Breaks: “Me time” isn’t always easy to find, but it’s important. We carve out small moments during the day to recharge. Go to the store alone? Yes, please. Stepping outside for five minutes of fresh air? Absolutely. These mini-breaks make a world of difference, even if they’re short.
  • Understanding It’s Okay to Not Be Perfect: Overstimulation can make you feel like you’re failing as a parent or partner. But we’ve learned that struggling sometimes is okay. We don’t need to handle everything perfectly. It’s okay to ask for help, take breaks, and lean on each other when needed. We’re in this together—imperfections and all.

Looking Ahead: Moving Past Overstimulation

The reality of overstimulation is something many parents face, especially in high-stress situations like working from home and living with extended family. But it doesn’t have to control us. By recognizing the signs of overstimulation and making space for rest, we’re learning how to navigate these challenges more effectively.

In the next post, Part 3: Managing Friction Without Letting It Define You, we’ll explore how to handle the moments when the tension reaches its peak. We’ll dive into how we’re working through our conflicts and finding better ways to communicate so that the friction doesn’t define our relationship. It’s not always easy, but we’re taking it one step at a time, and we’ll share the lessons we’ve learned along the way.

overstimulation
Family Foundations

Behind Closed Doors: The Hidden Strain of Life Under One Roof

by Denise Wright

Introduction to “Behind Closed Doors”

When you’re dealing with friction in the home it feels like there isn’t any safe place to just be. If you’ve ever found yourself feeling like your family is one step away from an emotional explosion, you’re not alone. Parenting, marriage, and life in general can bring a lot of joy, but it can also bring a whole lot of friction—especially when you’re living, working, and homeschooling under one roof with no break in sight.

In this four-part series, Behind Closed Doors, I’m opening up about the realities of life as a parent and partner, navigating the unique challenges that come with constant proximity. It’s raw. It’s real. And it’s something many of us are struggling with but rarely talk about.

From the emotional toll of constant parenting to the miscommunications that build up between partners, this series will explore the tension that arises from living and working together 24/7. But it’s not all negative. I’ll also share how we’re learning to manage these challenges, work through the friction, and grow as a family.

This is your invitation to look behind the scenes of our home life, where moments of joy mix with tension, and where we’re doing our best to get through with love, patience, and a whole lot of grace.

If constant togetherness has worn you down, you’ve struggled to find space for yourself, or dealt with communication breakdowns with your partner, this series is for you. Let’s dive into the realities of life behind closed doors.

The Pressure of Living with Friction in the Home: When Parenting and Work Collide

Parenting is a full-time job on its own, but add in the stress of working from home, homeschooling, and living with extended family, and it feels like the pressure builds every single day. For Matt and me, it’s like clockwork—every few weeks, we end up in a blowout argument that leaves us both emotionally drained. And honestly? Most of the time, it’s because we haven’t communicated properly or we’ve become overstimulated by the constant demands of parenting.

We’re together all the time. Both of us work from home, and the kids are homeschooled, so we rarely get a break from one another. For a lot of people, that might sound like paradise, but for us, it starts to feel like being on the edge of a pressure cooker that might blow at any moment. It’s not that we don’t love each other—trust me, we do. But after a while, the constant togetherness wears on you, and little things start to feel way bigger than they are.

When Constant Togetherness Feels Like Too Much

friction in the home

I don’t think either of us expected how intense the pressure would be when we’re together all the time. We both love being home, and honestly, I wouldn’t have it any other way. But when you’re always under the same roof, there’s a point where it can start to feel like there’s no escape—no moment to step back and breathe.

Living in someone else’s home only adds to the complexity. Matt and I have so many responsibilities, and while we’re grateful for the support of our extended family, it can get tough. We’re balancing work, parenting, and trying to maintain some sense of privacy, and honestly? It’s exhausting.

It’s hard to find that mental space to unwind, especially when it feels like everyone’s needs are constantly being piled on top of each other. I find myself wishing for just a little space to think.

Why Little Things Turn into Big Fights

Have you ever noticed how, when you’re stressed, the smallest things can send you into a tailspin? For us, when we’re both overwhelmed, friction builds. It’s usually nothing major—just small miscommunications that snowball into something bigger. What starts as a minor misunderstanding quickly turns into exhaustion, frustration, and us wondering how we got here.

It’s easy to let frustration take over when both of us are running on empty. We try to keep things light, but sometimes it feels impossible. Especially when we’re both overstimulated and in desperate need of downtime. Suddenly, something as small as a misplaced item or a misheard comment feels like the biggest issue in the world. The tension builds, and it feels impossible to break through.

The Pressure Cooker Effect: When Friction in the Home is Too Much to Handle

Sometimes, it feels like we’re living in a pressure cooker. The constant stress of balancing everything we do just piles up until it all comes out in one big release. It’s not something we plan for, but the tension builds, and before long, we’re both feeling the weight of it.

It’s tough because we both know we’re trying our best. But when communication breaks down (or I get too overwhelmed to communicate properly), frustration kicks in. The hardest part is realizing that friction isn’t a sign of failure. It’s a natural part of the process. What matters is how we handle ourselves during the friction. And I rarely handle myself with grace, which only makes things harder for Matt. Even knowing this doesn’t make it any easier when you’re in the middle of it.

Friction in the Home Isn’t a Sign of Failure: It’s Just Part of the Journey

One thing I’ve learned is that friction in the home is normal. I used to believe that arguments and frustration meant we were doing something wrong. But now, I realize that conflict simply comes with being in close relationships. It’s not a failure; it’s a sign that we’re living life together, and things won’t always go smoothly.

This is a lesson we’re still working on, but I’m getting there. The key to getting through these moments is understanding that stress and tension are temporary. They’re hard, yes, but they don’t define us. The real work is in how we come together afterward, how we talk it out, and how we make space for the rest and recovery we both need.

Matt is the type that just needs to talk things out then and there otherwise he can’t get anything done. While I’m the type that just needs you to leave me alone to process my own way and in my own time before I can talk about it. Which brings its own level of stress because clearly those are two very opposite ways of handling frustrations.

So, yeah—living with friction isn’t easy. But I’m learning that it’s part of the process of building a family and navigating life together. Communication, patience, and a little bit of grace go a long way. I just need to learn to give us much grace as I want from others.

Key Takeaways:

  • Understanding the emotional toll and working through it together is key to growing stronger as a couple and as a family.
  • Balancing parenting, work, and living with extended family can be a huge source of stress.
  • Constant togetherness, while often enjoyable, can lead to overstimulation and tension.
  • Miscommunication, or lack of communication, is often the root of big blowouts.
  • Friction in the home doesn’t mean you’re failing—it’s a natural part of family life.

Looking Ahead: Tackling Overstimulation in Parenting

Now that we’ve acknowledged the friction that naturally builds up in our home, the next step is figuring out how to manage the overstimulation that so often triggers these conflicts. In the next post, Part 2: The Impact of Overstimulation on Relationships, I’ll dive into how both Matt and I deal with the stress of constant demands—whether it’s from the kids, work, or just being together all the time. Understanding how overstimulation affects us as individuals and as a couple is crucial to finding better ways to manage these moments before they boil over.

So, stick around for the next part of this journey. I’m excited to share how we’re learning to recognize when we’ve hit our limit and how we can work through these stress points as a team. It’s not always easy, but we’re getting there one step at a time.

Let’s Talk

Have you experienced similar friction in your home? How do you manage the tension that comes with constant togetherness? Share your thoughts and tips in the comments below—we’d love to hear how you navigate the challenges of family life!

improving as a parent
Family Journey

Why Improving as a Parent is More Important Than Being Perfect

by Denise Wright

Ever feel like the task of improving as a parent is as daunting as climbing Mount Everest? As a mom, it’s easy to get caught up in the chaos of everyday life. You know… like the endless laundry, the never-ending to-do lists, and the moments when everything feels out of control. There are days when I feel like I’m failing as a parent, or as the wife I want to be. There are moments when the weight of responsibility feels overwhelming, and the pressures of life leave me wondering if I’m doing enough. But despite it all, I am beyond grateful for my family.

In the midst of the beautiful mess, I realize that what truly matters is not perfection, but the love and commitment we share with one another. Life will throw challenges our way, and not every day will go as planned. We may face struggles we didn’t see coming, or bumps in the road that feel too big to handle. Yet, when I stop to reflect, I see that I am blessed beyond measure. Because every day, I have the chance to try again. I have the chance to be a little better than I was yesterday. And that, to me, is enough.

Improving as a Parent, One Step at a Time

There’s so much pressure to be the perfect parent, the perfect spouse, the perfect everything. But what I’ve come to realize is that perfection isn’t the goal—improving as a parent is. No matter how hard things get or how imperfect we may feel, what matters most is that we keep showing up. Every single day, we have the opportunity to improve, even just a little bit. Whether it’s being more patient with our kids, being more present for our spouse, or finding the courage to face the day with a positive attitude, it’s all about striving for progress, not perfection.

Today, like every Monday, I had a long to-do list. But every time I started on a task, my daughter had ten things she was dying to tell me—every two seconds. Needless to say, my list didn’t get done. But that’s okay! Why? Because she’ll remember that Mommy embraced the chaos, took the time to play along, and listened. I know this can’t happen all the time, especially with both Matt and I working from home. But the truth is, there’s nothing more important than pausing to engage with your kids. Some kids shy away from talking to their parents—mine, on the other hand, just can’t stop. Am I the only one?

Discover tips for improving as a parent.

To me, this is a sign that we’re doing something right. The fact that my kids want to talk to us is proof that, despite all our imperfections, we’re showing up for them. It’s a reminder that, even with all the mistakes we make, we are growing and learning and doing everything we can to raise our kids with all the love we have for them.

When we slip up, when we make mistakes, it’s okay. It doesn’t erase all the love and care we give. What matters is that we get up the next day and try again. We may not be perfect, but we’re always growing. We’re always learning. And we’re always showing our family that no matter what life throws our way, we are committed to improving as a parent, a better spouse, and a better person—for them and for ourselves.

Why Embracing the Chaos is the Key to Improving as a Parent

Through the hard times, the tears, and the frustrations, there’s one constant that keeps me going—my family. My kids and my spouse—they are the reason I keep trying, the reason I keep striving to be better. We are a team, and even when we don’t get it right, the love we share makes everything worthwhile.

No, we don’t have it all figured out. We still make mistakes. But we have each other, and that’s something I’ll never take for granted. The beauty of family is in its imperfection—its messiness, its ups and downs—and through it all, we grow stronger together. The moments of laughter, the shared experiences, and the support we give each other make everything else fade away.

improving as a parent
Learn More

Sometimes, you just need to sit there and focus on controlling your face as your child enthusiastically tells a story about something they learned. It can take them ten minutes to get to the simple point, and you’re doing your best to stay patient, nodding along, even when you have a million things on your mind.

The Power of Listening: A Simple Way to Improve as a Parent

I remember one afternoon when my daughter excitedly started talking about a show she had watched. She jumped from one detail to the next, revisiting parts of the show, asking questions that didn’t quite make sense, and pausing to make sure I was listening intently. I could see the excitement in her eyes, but all I could think was, please just get to the point already.

In those moments, it’s easy to get frustrated, but I’ve learned to remind myself that this is her way of connecting with me. And if it takes ten minutes for her to share a simple fact, so be it. The joy in her voice and the effort she puts into sharing what she learned is priceless.

As parents, we have the incredible privilege of shaping our children’s lives, but we also have the chance to teach them that life isn’t about being flawless. It’s about love. It’s about trying our best, learning from our mistakes, and always striving to be better, not just for ourselves, but for those we love.

The Importance of Showing Up Every Day

To all the moms and dads out there who feel like they’re not doing enough or who feel like the tasking of improving as a parent is beyond your ability, I want to say this: You are enough. You are doing the best you can with what you have. And that’s what matters. We’re all just trying to do our best, one day at a time. We may not be perfect, but as long as you’re trying, that’s all that matters. And that is something to be proud of.

So, no matter what life throws at you today or tomorrow, remember that tomorrow is a new day—a fresh start. You have the opportunity to be a better version of yourself than you were yesterday. And that’s all you need to focus on. You’re doing great. Keep going.

Conclusion: A Grateful Heart

I’m grateful for my family—for the chaos and the calm, for the laughter and the tears, for the lessons learned and the love shared. No matter what comes our way, we will face it together. Every day is a new opportunity to try again, to improve as a parent, and to love one another more deeply.

So, as I wake up each day, I’m determined to be a little better, to show up with a grateful heart and an open mind. For my family, for me, and for all the little moments that make life truly beautiful. Being not much of a morning person makes this battle twice as hard! But if I can do it, so can you!

A parent and child sitting together, talking about mental health.
Family Journey

How to Talk to Your Kids About Mental Health

by Denise Wright

Breaking the Silence Around Mental Health

Mental health can feel overwhelming. Talking to kids about mental health… even more so. But it’s one of the most important conversations parents can have. Whether it’s helping them understand their own emotions or teaching them how to support others, opening the door to these discussions early creates a foundation of empathy, understanding, and resilience.

In this post, we’ll explore practical tips for starting conversations about mental health with your children, making the topic approachable, and creating a safe space for them to express their feelings.

Why Talking to Your Kids About Mental Health Matters

Mental health impacts every aspect of our lives, from how we think and feel to how we interact with others. Helping kids understand the importance of mental health early on:

  • Normalizes the conversation and reduces stigma.
  • Encourages them to express their feelings and seek help when needed.
  • Teaches them to recognize signs of stress or anxiety in themselves and others.

Start the Conversation Early

You don’t need to wait for a “big moment” to talk about mental health. Everyday situations—like a bad day at school or a sibling argument—are great opportunities to introduce the topic.

Practical Tips:

  • Use age-appropriate language: For younger kids, explain feelings like sadness or worry in simple terms. For older kids, you can introduce concepts like stress or anxiety.
  • Lead by example: Share moments when you felt overwhelmed and how you managed those emotions.
  • Ask open-ended questions: Instead of “Are you okay?” try “How are you feeling about what happened?”

Create a Safe Space for Sharing

Kids need to feel safe to talk about their feelings without fear of judgment or punishment.

How to Create a Safe Space:

  • Be present: Put away distractions and focus on them during the conversation.
  • Validate their feelings: Let them know it’s okay to feel sad, angry, or scared.
  • Avoid jumping to solutions: Sometimes, they just need to be heard.

Teach Them Healthy Coping Strategies

It’s not enough to talk about mental health; kids also need tools to navigate their emotions.

Coping Strategies to Share:

  • Deep breathing exercises to manage stress.
  • Journaling to express feelings they might not want to say out loud.
  • Physical activity as a mood booster.
  • Creative outlets like drawing or music.

Know When to Seek Help

Sometimes, kids need more support than we can provide as parents. Teach them that it’s okay to ask for help.

Signs Your Child Might Need Professional Support:

  • Persistent sadness or worry that doesn’t go away.
  • Withdrawal from friends or activities they usually enjoy.
  • Trouble sleeping or changes in appetite.

If you notice these signs, reach out to a school counselor, pediatrician, or mental health professional.

Breaking the Cycle: Teaching What You Weren’t Taught

One of the hardest parts of raising kids to understand the importance of mental health is navigating it yourself—especially when it wasn’t something you grew up understanding. Mental health wasn’t openly discussed in my childhood. It wasn’t ignored, but it also wasn’t something we prioritized or even acknowledged. Instead, I learned to navigate my big feelings on my own, which often left me feeling overwhelmed and unsure of how to process what I was experiencing.

When I was a child, I faced significant loss that shaped me in ways I’m only beginning to understand. Losing my older brother to a tragic accident was devastating, and the grief felt unbearable at times. A year later, my older sister got married and moved out, leaving me as the oldest at home. It felt like my world shifted in the blink of an eye.

Without tools or guidance, I internalized a lot of those emotions. I didn’t know how to talk about the sadness, confusion, or even guilt I sometimes felt. I learned to keep going, to push through, and to cope in silence.

Now, as a parent, I see how those experiences shaped me. They taught me resilience, yes, but they also taught me to bury my feelings instead of addressing them. I don’t want that for my kids. I want them to know it’s okay to feel big emotions, to talk about their struggles, and to seek help when they need it.

What I’m Learning Along the Way:

  • It’s Okay Not to Have All the Answers: I remind myself that I don’t need to be an expert to start the conversation. Acknowledging mental health is an important first step.
  • Modeling Matters: Kids learn by watching us. When I take time to process my emotions or talk openly about struggles, I’m showing them that it’s okay to do the same.
  • Give Yourself Grace: Breaking generational cycles isn’t easy. There will be moments of doubt and missteps, but I try to focus on progress, not perfection.

By being open about my own learning process, I’m showing my kids that it’s never too late to prioritize mental health—and that even parents are still growing.

Keep the Conversation Going

Talking to your kids about mental health isn’t a one-time conversation—it’s an ongoing dialogue. By normalizing these discussions, providing a safe space, and teaching healthy coping strategies, we can help our kids develop the resilience they need to navigate life’s challenges.

Start small, stay consistent, and remember that it’s okay not to have all the answers. Most importantly, you’re showing up and starting the conversation.

How do you approach mental health conversations with your kids? Share your tips in the comments—we’d love to learn from you!

Family together, symbolizing the strength of rebuilding relationships and trust after challenges.
Faith and Family

Rebuilding After Hardship: Our Family’s Journey Toward Healing and Growth

by Denise Wright

Life has a way of humbling you when you least expect it. For years, we lived with purpose and a clear direction—or so we thought. Then, in what felt like a moment, everything shifted, leaving us scrambling to pick up the pieces. This post isn’t about tying everything up in a neat little bow. We’re still very much in the process of rebuilding after hardship. But I want to share what this journey looks like—raw, messy, and real—and how we’re learning to grow as a family through it all.

The Moment It Fell Apart

For over two decades, Matt carried his minister’s license. It wasn’t just a credential; it represented his calling and became a cornerstone of our lives. In 2021, when we felt the Lord leading us to pastor a small church in Montana, it felt like everything was falling into place. Working for the Lord in that capacity was something we always wanted, filled with both challenges and triumphs.

But life rarely follows a straight path. In Montana, Matt made a mistake that cost him his license, shaking the foundation of our lives. The weight of that loss hit us hard, forcing him to confront questions he didn’t have answers to: Who was he without that identity? How could we move forward as a family?

As if that weren’t enough, financial struggles forced us to leave Montana and return to Oklahoma. The move felt like defeat, as if everything we had worked for had crumbled beneath us. Moving back in with my parents—something we’ve had to do more than once in our 12 years of marriage—required a level of humility we weren’t sure we had in us to summon yet again.

In those moments, we felt like failures—sometimes, we still do. But we’re learning to show ourselves the same grace the Lord so freely gives. It’s a daily process, but that grace is what keeps us holding on and moving forward.

Rebuilding is a Choice

Hitting rock bottom brings an overwhelming temptation to stay there. Letting the pain consume you feels easier than facing the daunting climb out. When we were isolated in Montana—far from family support and grappling with the aftermath of Matt’s mistake—the weight of it all felt suffocating, as if being consumed was inevitable.

For our family, though, staying down was not an option. We committed to making changes—not just to our circumstances, but to our hearts, priorities, and vision for the future. Matt’s mistake painfully exposed a disconnect between us that we could no longer ignore. Addressing that divide became a necessary part of rebuilding and moving forward.

Rebuilding Trust, One Step at a Time

When everything finally came to light, the revelation hit like a tidal wave. I hadn’t seen it coming, and the weight of it left me reeling. I found myself questioning how we had strayed so far off track and wondering what we could have done differently.

Healing wasn’t just about addressing the mistake itself—the loss of Matt’s license, the move, or the ripple effects on our family. It also forced us to confront the deep wound of broken trust. Knowing that something so significant had been hidden from me cut deeper than I was prepared for, and it created additional friction between us that we couldn’t ignore.

While Matt and I worked through the fallout in our own ways, I wrestled with feelings of betrayal and sadness. Rebuilding wasn’t just about moving forward; it became a process of repairing trust, piece by fragile piece. Hurt like that doesn’t fade overnight. It demands time, honesty, and an enormous amount of grace—for him, for myself, and for us together.

Even with the challenges, we chose to see this season as an opportunity—a chance to reset, refocus, and rebuild. The path hasn’t been easy, but it has required us to let go of the need to have all the answers and instead commit to taking one step at a time, one day at a time, always together.

What Rebuilding after Hardship Looks Like for Us

Rebuilding isn’t glamorous. It’s messy, raw, and often filled with hard conversations and uncomfortable truths. There have been more tears than I can count. But even in the midst of all that, this season has also brought glimpses of grace, hope, and growth that remind us why we’re fighting to move forward.

Here’s what this journey looks like for us right now:

1. Focusing on Family First

Our family has become the foundation of everything we’re rebuilding. That means learning to show up for each other even when emotions are high and wounds are fresh. We’ve had to be intentional about creating routines that bring stability to our kids, even on days when Matt and I are struggling with our own emotions.

Open and honest communication has become non-negotiable. We talk with our kids about the challenges we’re facing in age-appropriate ways, and Matt and I are working hard to model what it looks like to face struggles together, with honesty and humility.

2. Rebuilding Trust in Our Marriage

The hardest part of this season has been the work Matt and I have done as a couple. Rebuilding trust after it breaks requires immense effort. The hurt cuts deep, and we’ve both had to confront it directly.

This process demands constant listening, unwavering honesty, and a shared commitment to rebuild our relationship piece by piece. Forgiveness isn’t something you choose once; it’s a decision we make every day. Some days feel easier than others, but we remain determined to move forward together, even when the path feels challenging.

The Hidden Struggles Behind the Scenes

Matt and I have been married for 12 years, a journey marked by highs, lows, and everything in between. The mistake that happened wasn’t small; it was the kind of event that can tear couples apart. To clarify, this wasn’t infidelity or anything of that sort. It stemmed from a series of poor financial decisions and compromised choices, made because Matt found himself in a position where he was forced to choose between meeting our family’s needs and doing what was right.

The pain it caused created distance, fueled resentment and brought heartbreak that seemed impossible to overcome.

These struggles often remain hidden from the outside world. To others, we might appear as though we have it all together. People assume everything is fine because we’ve learned how to show up, smile, and keep moving forward. The reality, however, is far different. There were moments when we were barely holding on—moments when the weight of it all felt crushing and left us questioning whether we could make it through.

Facing the Pain and Choosing to Stay

What made it even harder were the comments and beliefs tied to the idea that, as a married couple, we are “one.” While I respect and understand the biblical foundation of that unity, it was said that Matt’s mistake was my mistake too. But I can’t fully agree with that. His actions were his own, and while they deeply impacted us both, they weren’t something I caused or participated in. That belief added a layer of pain I wasn’t prepared for and made an already difficult situation even more complicated.

By the grace of God and the foundation laid by our upbringing, we somehow managed to hold it all together. But that doesn’t mean it was easy—far from it. There were moments when it felt like we were hanging on by a thread, moments when one or both of us thought about walking away. There were nights of silence, days filled with tension, and times when we wondered if we had anything left to give to each other.

Yet, through it all, we kept choosing to stay. To fight for what we had built. To believe that healing was possible, even when it felt out of reach. Holding it together didn’t mean pretending everything was perfect. It meant being willing to face the broken pieces and work together to rebuild them—no matter how messy or painful the process might be.

3. Setting Long-Term Goals

We have focused on moving forward by setting clear, tangible goals for the future. For us, this means achieving financial freedom, planning for a home of our own, and building a strong foundation for our kids’ futures.

The road ahead feels overwhelming at times. The distance between where we are and where we want to be can seem daunting. But these goals keep us grounded and provide a sense of direction. They give us something to work toward as a family, even when challenges arise.

This journey has also driven us to share openly about the raw, unfiltered reality of raising kids and navigating life’s hardships. Many versions of our story have been shared from different perspectives. While we understand those perspectives exist, we feel strongly about sharing our journey in our own voice.

Our intention is not to stir hurt or cause division but to offer honesty about where we are and how we are working to rebuild. Through transparency, we hope to encourage others who might feel alone in their struggles. If there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that connection and healing come from stepping into the light, even when it feels uncomfortable.

4. Rebuilding after a Hardship Means Leaning Into Faith

Our faith has endured challenges we never anticipated. Trusting God as life falls apart hasn’t been easy, but it has grounded and anchored us throughout this season.

We place our trust in Him, even when the “why” remains unclear. Prayer and scripture provide daily reminders of His grace and strength, becoming essential for not only rebuilding our lives but also healing our hearts.

Matt and I have always leaned toward introversion, but the events we’ve faced have caused us to retreat even further. Letting people into our lives feels riskier now, knowing how easily relationships can unintentionally cause hurt. Right now, we are prioritizing what matters most: the physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being of our family and its future.

If we seem less present or show up differently than we once did, please know it’s not about anyone else. We are intentionally creating the space we need to heal and regroup as a family. This season demands our full attention, and we deeply appreciate the patience and understanding of those who care about us.

The Lessons We’re Learning

This season has been filled with hard-earned lessons:

  • Grace Matters: We’ve had to learn to extend grace to ourselves and each other. Mistakes don’t define us—how we choose to move forward does.
  • Humility Is a Gift: Living with my parents again has been humbling, but it’s also reminded us of the power of starting over with help.
  • Trust Takes Time: Rebuilding trust isn’t a quick process. It’s built through consistent actions, honesty, and a willingness to confront the hard stuff together.
  • Faith Isn’t Easy, but It’s Worth It: Trusting God through uncertainty is challenging, but it’s also what sustains us when everything else feels shaky.

A Work in Progress

We haven’t reached the finish line yet. Truthfully, I’m not even sure what the finish line looks like. What I do know is this: rebuilding doesn’t require perfection. It demands showing up every day, even when it’s hard. It’s about choosing hope over despair and consistently taking small, intentional steps forward.

If you’re in a season of rebuilding, remember—you’re not alone. The process is messy and painful, but it also holds the potential for growth, healing, and grace. Let’s navigate this journey together, one step at a time.

A Season of Healing and Hope

This season of life has been heavy, but it’s also been one of reflection, growth, and hope. We’re learning that rebuilding doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a series of small, deliberate steps. And while the process isn’t easy, it’s teaching us the value of grace, perseverance, and faith.

If you’re in a season of rebuilding, whether it’s your marriage, your family, or even just yourself, know that you’re not alone. Healing is possible, even in the messiest and most painful moments. Lean into grace, take it one step at a time, and remember that progress, no matter how small, is still progress.

Let’s keep the conversation going! If this post resonated with you, you might also find these resources helpful:

We’d love to hear from you—what’s been your greatest lesson in seasons of rebuilding? Share in the comments or connect with us through the links above. Together, we can find strength and encouragement for the journey ahead. ❤️

Family unpacking boxes in a new home, symbolizing the transition from moving to stability.
Family Journey

Moving Toward Stability: Why We Chose to Settle Down

by Denise Wright

For years, our family lived a life filled with change. We packed up our lives and started over in new places more times than I can count. Each move brought hope for something better, a fresh start, and a chance to follow what we felt was our calling. But after years of moving, we finally decided to settle down and create a permanent home.

This wasn’t an easy choice. It came with its fair share of challenges and heartache. While we’re still in the early stages of working toward our goals, we believe this decision is a step in the right direction for our family. In this post, I’ll share why we chose to stop moving and how we’re starting to build a foundation for our future.

The Challenges of Constant Moving

If you’ve ever uprooted your family, you know how hard it can be. Moving isn’t just about packing boxes and renting a truck. It’s about leaving behind familiar faces, routines, and the sense of security that comes with having a place to call home.

For us, moving often meant starting from scratch—finding a new community, adjusting to different schools or churches, and figuring out how to make ends meet in unfamiliar circumstances. Each new chapter came with its own set of challenges, and while we embraced these changes with faith and hope, the emotional toll began to add up. This transient lifestyle was even more impactful for me, as it compounded the one I grew up with; my father was a pastor for most of my life, and moving frequently was simply part of our family dynamic.

Our kids, though resilient and adaptable, began to feel the strain as well. Each move brought the challenge of making new friends, adjusting to new routines, and saying goodbye to the familiar. As parents, it became increasingly clear that stability was essential for our family to truly thrive. We couldn’t ignore the pattern we had fallen into—a seemingly never-ending loop of starting over and feeling like we were failing to build something lasting. We realized we didn’t want to pass that same cycle onto our kids, repeating the struggles we endured during our own childhoods.

Why We Moved So Often

Our moves weren’t always driven by a clear calling. In fact, the greater part of the last 12 years of moving was fueled by financial challenges or mental struggles. Sometimes, we simply needed a change to survive—to find stability or escape difficult circumstances. (And yes, there was even that one time we made the decision to move on the flip of a coin. It’s funny now, but at the time, it was a reflection of how lost we felt.)

While some moves were intentional and rooted in what we believed was a calling from God, those moments were fewer than we’d like to admit. When we did feel led by Him, we stepped out in faith, following doors we believed He opened for us. These moves often took us to unexpected places and taught us invaluable lessons. But even when the path seemed clear, the reality was that no move came without its challenges.

The Move to Montana: A Turning Point

One of the most significant moves we made was to Montana, where my husband, Matt, took on the role of pastoring a small church. It was a leap of faith, and we truly believed it was where we were meant to be. The opportunities and experiences there were unlike anything we’d ever had before, and we poured our hearts into that chapter of our lives.

But life doesn’t always go as planned. After two and a half years in Montana, we found ourselves at a crossroads. A mistake Matt made ultimately cost him his minister’s license, and the weight of that, combined with mounting financial struggles, made it impossible for us to stay. We couldn’t afford to live in Montana anymore, and we recognized that staying there wasn’t going to help us grow as a family.

The decision to leave wasn’t easy—it was humbling and painful—but it was necessary. Returning to Oklahoma became the reset we desperately needed to rebuild our lives and refocus on all aspects of our family’s future.

Why We Decided to Settle Down

After years of moving, we realized it was time to hit the pause button. Our family needed a reset—a chance to refocus, rebuild, and create a stable foundation for our future. Moving back to Oklahoma gave us that opportunity.

We’ve chosen to make Oklahoma our permanent home for several reasons:

  1. Financial Stability:
    Moving is expensive. The costs of relocating, finding new housing, and adjusting to a different cost of living had taken a toll. By settling down, we can focus on building financial freedom and working toward owning a place of our own.
  2. Family Support:
    Living with my parents has given us the chance to regroup and lean on the support of family. It’s allowed us to create long-term goals while giving our kids a sense of consistency and belonging.
  3. A Fresh Start:
    Staying in one place gives us the chance to work through past mistakes, learn from them, and build a future filled with purpose and growth.
  4. Our Kids’ Futures:
    We want to give our children a strong foundation—a place to call home and the stability to pursue their dreams without the constant upheaval of moving.

How We’re Building a Stable Future

Settling down doesn’t mean life suddenly becomes easy, but it does mean we can focus on what truly matters. We’ve set clear goals for our family over the next five years:

  1. Financial Freedom:
    We’re working toward paying off debt, saving for a home, and creating a budget that aligns with our long-term goals.
  2. Prioritizing Family Growth:
    By staying in one place, we can invest in activities and routines that strengthen our family bond—like homeschooling, family dinners, and local involvement.
  3. Creating a Permanent Home:
    While we’re currently living with my parents, we’re saving and planning for a home of our own in Oklahoma. This is more than a house; it’s the foundation for the life we want to build.
  4. Planning for the Kids’ Futures:
    From educational opportunities to instilling values that will guide them through life, we’re working to prepare our kids for success in every sense of the word.

The Lessons We’ve Learned from Moving

Looking back, I don’t regret the years of moving. Each chapter taught us something valuable about faith, resilience, and what truly matters. Moving gave us experiences we’ll cherish forever, but it also taught us the importance of creating roots.

Here are a few lessons we’ve learned:

  • God’s Plan Is Bigger Than Ours:
    Every move had a purpose, even if we didn’t see it at the time. Trusting His plan, even in the hard moments, has been a constant theme in our journey.
  • Stability Matters:
    While adventure is exciting, stability provides the space for growth, healing, and thriving as a family.
  • Mistakes Don’t Define Us:
    Moving back to Oklahoma was humbling, but it also gave us the opportunity to reset, refocus, and ensure we never repeat the mistakes of the past.

Conclusion: Finding Peace in Settling Down

After years of moving, we’ve finally found peace in settling down. While it wasn’t the easiest journey, it is shaping us in countless ways. Choosing to stay in Oklahoma is about more than geography—it’s about creating a stable, loving environment where our family can heal, grow, and thrive.

If you’re a parent navigating the challenges of moving or wondering if it’s time to settle down, know that you’re not alone. Every family’s journey is different, but what matters most is finding what works for you and your loved ones.

And if you’re curious to hear more about our family’s story and the lessons we’ve learned, check out our podcast, Our Family Experiment. You can find all our episodes here.

Parenting Podcast
Family Journey

Parenting Podcast Episode 1 Recap: Parenting Without a Playbook

by Denise Wright

Parenting is unpredictable, messy, and full of surprises—but it’s also deeply rewarding. In the first episode of Our Family Experiment, Matt and I dove into the reality of raising kids without a manual. If you’ve ever felt like you’re figuring things out on the fly, this parenting podcast episode is for you.

What We Talked About on our Parenting Podcast

Our debut episode highlights the lessons, challenges, and joys of parenting. Here are some key takeaways:

1. Parenting is a Journey of Learning
From diaper disasters to navigating big feelings, every parent has their “winging it” moments. Matt and I shared our own stories about figuring things out along the way, sometimes with hilarious results.

2. Faith as a Foundation
For us, faith is the cornerstone of our parenting journey. We shared how leaning on prayer and trusting in God’s plan has brought strength and clarity during life’s challenges. And let’s just say we’ve learned—sometimes the hard way—that making major decisions for your family’s future should never, I repeat never, involve flipping a coin!

3. Wins and Fails: A Peek Into Real Life
Parenting isn’t always pretty, but it’s full of relatable moments. In this episode, we shared a parenting win that gave us hope and a fail that had us laughing in hindsight.

4. What the Kids Think
Our favorite part of the episode was hearing from Ethan and Addison. They offered their candid (and often hilarious) take on having parents who don’t always have it together. Spoiler: the kids were uncharacteristically shy in this episode!

Why You’ll Love This Parenting Podcast

The goal of Our Family Experiment is to remind parents that nobody has all the answers. Parenting isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress, love, and showing up for your kids every day.

Listen to our Parenting Podcast

Missed Episode 1? No worries! Tune in now:

Let’s Hear from You

What did you think of Episode 1 of our parenting podcast? Share your thoughts by emailing us at contact@ourfamilyexperiment.com or connect with us on social media. Let’s navigate the ups and downs of parenting together!

peace at home
Family Foundations

Creating Peace at Home: Turning Your House into a Sanctuary for Your Family

by Denise Wright

Introduction

Home should be more than just the place where we sleep, eat, and juggle the chaos of daily life—it should feel like a sanctuary. As parents, Matt and I know how challenging it can be to create peace at home, especially with kids, work, and an endless to-do list. But we’ve also learned that with a few intentional changes, it’s possible to build a space that feels calming, welcoming, and restorative for the whole family.

In this post, we’re sharing practical tips and insights from our own journey to make our home a place of peace. From managing the noise and clutter to creating moments of connection, these small changes can have a big impact on the way your family feels at home.

1. Start with Decluttering the Physical Space

It’s hard to feel peaceful when you’re surrounded by piles of stuff. One of the biggest things Matt and I have learned is that clutter isn’t just visual—it creates mental and emotional stress too.

We don’t have a Pinterest-perfect house by any means, but we’ve worked on minimizing the chaos by regularly decluttering. A great place to start is with the common areas: the kitchen, living room, and entryway. Once those spaces feel more open and organized, it’s amazing how much lighter the whole house feels.

💡 Practical Tip: Involve the kids in decluttering by turning it into a fun challenge. Who can fill a box of items to donate the fastest?

2. Prioritize Moments of Connection

Peace at home isn’t just about how a house looks—it’s about how it feels. And nothing creates a sense of calm like meaningful family connections. For us, this means carving out intentional time to connect with our kids, even if it’s just over dinner or playing video games with the kids after their schoolwork is completed.

Sometimes it’s as simple as turning off the TV and really listening to what the kids are saying. Other times, it’s planning a family movie night or taking a walk together. These small moments create a sense of belonging and stability that helps everyone feel more grounded.

3. Create Personal Spaces for Everyone

While we value togetherness, we’ve also learned that everyone needs a little personal space to recharge. For Matt, it’s his desk; for me, it’s a cozy corner with a comfy chair where I can game or work. The kids also have their own spaces where they can read, play, or unwind after a long day.

Having a designated spot for each family member to retreat to can work wonders for creating peace at home. It helps everyone recharge and prevents the whole family from getting overwhelmed by constant togetherness.

4. Add Calming Elements to Your Home

Sometimes, creating peace at home is as simple as changing the atmosphere. Adding soft lighting, calming scents, and cozy textures can completely transform the feel of a space.

We recently added a wax warmer to Matt’s desk that looks like a tiny fireplace, and it’s been such a simple but effective way to create a relaxing vibe. Whether it’s lighting a candle, playing soft background music, or investing in a fluffy throw blanket for the couch, these small touches make a big difference.

5. Establish a Routine That Works for Your Family

Chaos often sneaks into our home when there’s a lack of structure. While we’re not sticklers for a rigid schedule, having a flexible routine helps keep the day-to-day manageable and creates a sense of predictability for everyone.

For example, we’ve established simple morning and evening routines that help set the tone for the day and wind everyone down at night. Knowing what to expect takes the guesswork out of daily life and creates a foundation of peace.

💡 Practical Tip: Start small. Even a 5-minute family check-in at the end of the day can help everyone feel more connected and calm.

6. Model Peaceful Behavior

We’ve learned the hard way that our kids mirror what they see. If Matt and I are constantly stressed, snapping at each other, or rushing from one task to the next, that energy trickles down to the kids, fast.

Instead, we’ve been trying to model calm behavior (as much as possible). This means taking a breath before responding, using kind tones even when we’re frustrated, and showing the kids how we handle stress in healthy ways.

7. Celebrate the Small Wins

Creating peace at home is a process, not an overnight transformation. Celebrate the little victories along the way, whether it’s a decluttered corner, a smooth bedtime routine, or a day when everyone manages to stay calm and connected.

We’ve found that celebrating these small wins helps us stay motivated and reminds us why we’re making these changes in the first place—to create a home where everyone feels loved, supported, and at peace.

Conclusion: Building Peace at Home Takes Intention

Creating a home that feels like a sanctuary doesn’t mean having a perfectly decorated house or a stress-free life. It’s about making intentional choices that bring calm, connection, and joy into your space.

By decluttering, prioritizing family time, and adding little touches of calm, you can transform your house into a place where your family can recharge and grow together. Remember, peace at home isn’t about perfection—it’s about creating an environment where everyone feels safe, loved, and at ease.

What’s one step you can take today to create more peace at home? Let us know! And if you’re looking for more tips and insights, subscribe below to Our Family Experiment for updates and exclusive content.

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