A family of four in their home after a quarrel, highlighting the need for alone time for parents to recharge and reconnect.
Family Life

Alone Time for Parents: Why Is it Important?

by Denise Wright

Introduction: Why Alone Time Matters for Parents

Parenting is a full-time job that doesn’t come with breaks, and as much as we love our kids, the constant demands can be exhausting. That’s why alone time for parents isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.

This week, Matt and I are making it a priority to carve out some much-needed time together with a date night while the kids stay the night with family. After a particularly rough week, we realized just how overstimulated and overdue we are for some quiet, intentional time to recharge and reconnect—not just for ourselves, but for the well-being of our family as a whole.

In this post, I’ll share why alone time is so crucial for parents, how it benefits your marriage and your kids, and practical tips to make it happen, even with a busy schedule.

Recognizing the Signs of Burnout and Overstimulation

Last week was tough. Both Matt and I could feel the weight of burnout and overstimulation taking a toll on us. It wasn’t just the physical exhaustion—it was the emotional edge that crept into everything we did. The smallest things became triggers, and we found ourselves snapping over things that wouldn’t normally bother us.

It hit me hardest when I started saying things I didn’t really mean—things that came out of my frustration and desire to fix the situation. At one point, I even said, “Well, I’ll just take the kids and leave for a few hours so you don’t have to deal with us.” As soon as the words were out, I regretted them. I didn’t mean it, but it reflected just how drained I felt and how desperate I was for a solution.

Matt and I both recognize these signs of burnout now—the irritation, the short tempers, the way we withdraw from each other without meaning to. It’s not who we are at our core, but it’s a signal that we need to take a step back and prioritize our own well-being and connection.

We know that when we’re operating on empty, we’re not the parents or partners we want to be. And while it’s hard to admit when we’re at that breaking point, it’s necessary if we want to grow and move forward as a family.

Why Alone Time is Essential

Parenting is rewarding, but it’s also demanding. Without time to recharge, it’s easy to feel burnt out, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your partner. Alone time allows you to:

  • Recharge Your Energy: Taking time for yourself helps you refuel emotionally and mentally, so you can parent from a place of calm rather than exhaustion.
  • Strengthen Your Relationship: Spending intentional time with your partner helps you reconnect, build intimacy, and tackle parenting challenges as a team.
  • Set a Healthy Example: When your kids see you prioritizing self-care and your relationship, they learn the importance of balance and healthy boundaries.

How Alone Time Benefits Your Marriage

Date nights and quality time with your partner are more than just a chance to relax—they’re essential for maintaining a strong relationship. Here’s why:

  • Improved Communication: Without the distractions of daily life, you can focus on truly hearing and understanding each other.
  • Deeper Connection: Alone time lets you reconnect as individuals, not just as parents.
  • Shared Joy: Doing something fun or meaningful together reminds you why you fell in love in the first place.

For Matt and me, date nights are our way of hitting the reset button. This Friday, we’re taking the kids to stay with family so we can enjoy an evening just for us. It’s not extravagant, but it’s intentional—and that makes all the difference.

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Practical Tips for Making it Happen

Finding time for yourself or your partner isn’t always easy, but it’s worth the effort. Here are some practical ways to prioritize alone time:

  1. Schedule It In: Treat alone time like any other important appointment. Put it on the calendar and commit to it.
  2. Ask for Help: Don’t be afraid to lean on family or trusted friends for childcare. Most people are happy to help if you ask.
  3. Keep It Simple: Alone time doesn’t have to be elaborate. A quiet evening at home, a walk around the neighborhood, or coffee at your favorite spot can be just as meaningful as a night out.
  4. Make It Regular: Aim for consistency. Whether it’s a monthly date night or a weekly hour to yourself, regular alone time helps you recharge consistently.

Why It’s Good for Your Kids, Too

It’s easy to feel guilty about taking time for yourself, but the truth is, your kids benefit when you do. When parents take time to recharge and strengthen their relationship:

  • Kids see a model of healthy self-care.
  • They feel secure knowing their parents have a strong bond.
  • Parents return with more patience, energy, and joy to share with their children.

Recognizing the Need for a Pause

One of the biggest challenges we face as parents is the constant interruptions from our kids. Could Matt and I isolate ourselves to a single room and close the door? Sure. But somehow, they always find us. Whether it’s the endless questions, the persistent “mom” or “dad” calls, or even the sound of their footsteps coming down the hallway, it’s enough to feel overstimulating after a long day.

Adding to this challenge is the fact that we currently live with my parents. We don’t have a whole house to retreat to—just our bedroom, while the kids share a room of their own. The rest of the house is fair game for everyone. So even when we try to carve out a little space for ourselves, the reality is that there’s no real escape.

It’s not just the interruptions, though. It’s the way the kids argue in the next room, burst in needing something right when we’ve sat down for a conversation, or wander through the shared spaces looking for attention. Even when we love them with all our hearts, those moments can leave us feeling completely drained.

These are the signs we’ve learned to recognize—it’s our internal alarm system telling us it’s time for a pause. When everything feels too loud, too chaotic, and too constant, we know we need to step back, create intentional time for ourselves, and reset.

Prioritizing alone time as a couple isn’t about escaping the kids or neglecting our responsibilities—it’s about recharging so we can show up as the parents and partners we want to be. And sometimes, that means acknowledging that even the little things, like footsteps in the hallway or the lack of personal space, are reminders that we’re overdue for a break.

Conclusion: Prioritizing Alone Time is a Gift to Your Family

Alone time for parents isn’t selfish—it’s an investment in your well-being, your marriage, and your family as a whole. Taking even small moments to recharge allows you to show up as the best version of yourself for your kids and your partner.

This Friday, Matt and I are taking that time, and we couldn’t be more excited. Whether it’s a date night, a quiet walk, or an hour to yourself, I encourage you to find ways to prioritize alone time in your own life. You—and your family—will be better for it.

How do you prioritize alone time as a parent?

I’d love to hear your ideas in the comments. Let’s inspire each other to take care of ourselves and our relationships!

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A parent and child sitting together, talking about mental health.
Family Journey

How to Talk to Your Kids About Mental Health

by Denise Wright

Breaking the Silence Around Mental Health

Mental health can feel overwhelming. Talking to kids about mental health… even more so. But it’s one of the most important conversations parents can have. Whether it’s helping them understand their own emotions or teaching them how to support others, opening the door to these discussions early creates a foundation of empathy, understanding, and resilience.

In this post, we’ll explore practical tips for starting conversations about mental health with your children, making the topic approachable, and creating a safe space for them to express their feelings.

Why Talking to Your Kids About Mental Health Matters

Mental health impacts every aspect of our lives, from how we think and feel to how we interact with others. Helping kids understand the importance of mental health early on:

  • Normalizes the conversation and reduces stigma.
  • Encourages them to express their feelings and seek help when needed.
  • Teaches them to recognize signs of stress or anxiety in themselves and others.

Start the Conversation Early

You don’t need to wait for a “big moment” to talk about mental health. Everyday situations—like a bad day at school or a sibling argument—are great opportunities to introduce the topic.

Practical Tips:

  • Use age-appropriate language: For younger kids, explain feelings like sadness or worry in simple terms. For older kids, you can introduce concepts like stress or anxiety.
  • Lead by example: Share moments when you felt overwhelmed and how you managed those emotions.
  • Ask open-ended questions: Instead of “Are you okay?” try “How are you feeling about what happened?”

Create a Safe Space for Sharing

Kids need to feel safe to talk about their feelings without fear of judgment or punishment.

How to Create a Safe Space:

  • Be present: Put away distractions and focus on them during the conversation.
  • Validate their feelings: Let them know it’s okay to feel sad, angry, or scared.
  • Avoid jumping to solutions: Sometimes, they just need to be heard.

Teach Them Healthy Coping Strategies

It’s not enough to talk about mental health; kids also need tools to navigate their emotions.

Coping Strategies to Share:

  • Deep breathing exercises to manage stress.
  • Journaling to express feelings they might not want to say out loud.
  • Physical activity as a mood booster.
  • Creative outlets like drawing or music.

Know When to Seek Help

Sometimes, kids need more support than we can provide as parents. Teach them that it’s okay to ask for help.

Signs Your Child Might Need Professional Support:

  • Persistent sadness or worry that doesn’t go away.
  • Withdrawal from friends or activities they usually enjoy.
  • Trouble sleeping or changes in appetite.

If you notice these signs, reach out to a school counselor, pediatrician, or mental health professional.

Breaking the Cycle: Teaching What You Weren’t Taught

One of the hardest parts of raising kids to understand the importance of mental health is navigating it yourself—especially when it wasn’t something you grew up understanding. Mental health wasn’t openly discussed in my childhood. It wasn’t ignored, but it also wasn’t something we prioritized or even acknowledged. Instead, I learned to navigate my big feelings on my own, which often left me feeling overwhelmed and unsure of how to process what I was experiencing.

When I was a child, I faced significant loss that shaped me in ways I’m only beginning to understand. Losing my older brother to a tragic accident was devastating, and the grief felt unbearable at times. A year later, my older sister got married and moved out, leaving me as the oldest at home. It felt like my world shifted in the blink of an eye.

Without tools or guidance, I internalized a lot of those emotions. I didn’t know how to talk about the sadness, confusion, or even guilt I sometimes felt. I learned to keep going, to push through, and to cope in silence.

Now, as a parent, I see how those experiences shaped me. They taught me resilience, yes, but they also taught me to bury my feelings instead of addressing them. I don’t want that for my kids. I want them to know it’s okay to feel big emotions, to talk about their struggles, and to seek help when they need it.

What I’m Learning Along the Way:

  • It’s Okay Not to Have All the Answers: I remind myself that I don’t need to be an expert to start the conversation. Acknowledging mental health is an important first step.
  • Modeling Matters: Kids learn by watching us. When I take time to process my emotions or talk openly about struggles, I’m showing them that it’s okay to do the same.
  • Give Yourself Grace: Breaking generational cycles isn’t easy. There will be moments of doubt and missteps, but I try to focus on progress, not perfection.

By being open about my own learning process, I’m showing my kids that it’s never too late to prioritize mental health—and that even parents are still growing.

Keep the Conversation Going

Talking to your kids about mental health isn’t a one-time conversation—it’s an ongoing dialogue. By normalizing these discussions, providing a safe space, and teaching healthy coping strategies, we can help our kids develop the resilience they need to navigate life’s challenges.

Start small, stay consistent, and remember that it’s okay not to have all the answers. Most importantly, you’re showing up and starting the conversation.

How do you approach mental health conversations with your kids? Share your tips in the comments—we’d love to learn from you!

A thoughtful woman reflecting on her insecurities.
Inspiration and Reflection

When Insecurities Take Over: Lessons From a Tough Week

by Denise Wright

Insecurities have driven much of my behavior this week, and it’s time to take accountability. This isn’t your typical “parenting” post. I’m not here to share tips or lessons learned from my kids. Instead, this post is about me—about the insecurities, struggles, and mistakes that have taken center stage in my life this week.

Matt and I have been in a perpetual argument for days now, and I know a lot of it stems from me. My insecurities, my need to fix things immediately, and my inability to give him the space he needs have turned small moments into big conflicts.

I’ve said and done things I wouldn’t normally say or do, and it’s left me feeling drained. But I believe there’s healing in speaking openly about these struggles—acknowledging the mistakes, holding myself accountable, and taking the steps to seek help. Maybe you’ve been here too. If so, I hope my story reminds you that you’re not alone.

Recognizing the Cycle of Insecurities

This week made me painfully aware of how my insecurities drive my actions. When Matt feels frustrated or upset, my first instinct is to assume it’s my fault. That assumption triggers a need to fix the situation immediately, even when he needs space. Instead of letting him process, I push for solutions, which only escalates the tension.

It’s a cycle I’ve been stuck in for years: insecurity, overreaction, and regret. Recognizing it is one thing, but breaking it? That’s something I’m still working on.

Owning My Part in Letting Insecurities Take Over

I said and did things this week that I wish I could take back. Words spoken in frustration, actions driven by fear—it’s not who I want to be, but it’s who I’ve been in those moments.

Part of the healing process is accountability. I can’t undo what’s been said or done, but I can take ownership. I can apologize, not just to Matt, but to myself for letting insecurities control me. And I can work toward becoming the person I want to be: someone who listens more, reacts less, and allows space for others to feel without making it about me.

Seeking Help to Overcome Insecurities

This week, I let my insecurities get the better of me, leading to moments I deeply regret. In a breakdown, I turned to TikTok Live, momentarily seeking input and validation from strangers—something I quickly realized was a mistake. As soon as it hit me how inappropriate and unproductive that was, I immediately ended the livestream. But not before people I care about saw it and started reaching out, worried and confused.

To those who saw that moment and felt concerned, I want to apologize. It wasn’t fair to pull others into my raw, unfiltered emotions like that, especially in such a public way. My intention wasn’t to alarm or cause hurt, but I know my actions may have done just that. I’m sorry for not handling my emotions more constructively and privately.

This moment also brought up a lot of unresolved pain. There are people in my life—people I’ve loved deeply and considered lifelong friends—who have completely blocked me from their lives. This isn’t a new experience; I’ve dealt with this kind of loss since my teenage years. My insecurities tell me it’s because of how I’ve tried to fix things and, in doing so, made everything worse. Whether or not that’s true, the pattern feels inescapable, and it feeds my belief that I’ll never get it right.

Acknowledging this is painful, but I know I need to face it. I’m learning that healing isn’t just about repairing the present; it’s about addressing the wounds of the past that still shape my actions today.

Lessons Learned

Here’s what I’m taking away from this week:

  1. Not everything is my fault. People are allowed to have bad days, and it doesn’t always mean it’s about me.
  2. Space is healthy. Sometimes, giving someone time to process is the most loving thing I can do.
  3. Grace is essential. For Matt, for myself, and for the process of learning and growing.

Conclusion

I’m still raw, emotionally and mentally, but I’m learning. Speaking openly about this is part of my healing process. It’s a reminder to hold myself accountable, to seek help, and to give grace—to Matt, to myself, and to the journey we’re on.

If you’ve struggled with similar insecurities or conflicts, know that you’re not alone. Healing is messy, but it’s also worth it.

Let’s Talk About It

Have you ever struggled with insecurities in your relationships? Let’s talk about it. Share your story with me via email at [email protected] or connect with me directly on Facebook or Instagram. Together, we can navigate the ups and downs of personal growth.

Family together, symbolizing the strength of rebuilding relationships and trust after challenges.
Faith and Family

Rebuilding After a Fall: How We’re Putting Our Family Back Together

by Denise Wright

Life has a way of humbling you when you least expect it. For years, we lived with purpose and a clear direction—or so we thought. Then, in what felt like a moment, everything shifted, leaving us scrambling to pick up the pieces. This post isn’t about tying everything up in a neat little bow. We’re still very much in the process of rebuilding our lives. But I want to share what this journey looks like—raw, messy, and real—and how we’re learning to grow as a family through it all.

The Moment It Fell Apart

For over two decades, Matt carried his minister’s license. It wasn’t just a credential; it represented his calling and became a cornerstone of our lives. In 2021, when we felt the Lord leading us to pastor a small church in Montana, it felt like everything was falling into place. Working for the Lord in that capacity was something we always wanted, filled with both challenges and triumphs.

But life rarely follows a straight path. In Montana, Matt made a mistake that cost him his license, shaking the foundation of our lives. The weight of that loss hit us hard, forcing him to confront questions he didn’t have answers to: Who was he without that identity? How could we move forward as a family?

As if that weren’t enough, financial struggles forced us to leave Montana and return to Oklahoma. The move felt like defeat, as if everything we had worked for had crumbled beneath us. Moving back in with my parents—something we’ve had to do more than once in our 12 years of marriage—required a level of humility we weren’t sure we had in us to summon yet again.

In those moments, we felt like failures—sometimes, we still do. But we’re learning to show ourselves the same grace the Lord so freely gives. It’s a daily process, but that grace is what keeps us holding on and moving forward.

Rebuilding is a Choice

Hitting rock bottom brings an overwhelming temptation to stay there. Letting the pain consume you feels easier than facing the daunting climb out. When we were isolated in Montana—far from family support and grappling with the aftermath of Matt’s mistake—the weight of it all felt suffocating, as if being consumed was inevitable.

For our family, though, staying down was not an option. We committed to making changes—not just to our circumstances, but to our hearts, priorities, and vision for the future. Matt’s mistake painfully exposed a disconnect between us that we could no longer ignore. Addressing that divide became a necessary part of rebuilding and moving forward.

Rebuilding Trust, One Step at a Time

When everything finally came to light, the revelation hit like a tidal wave. I hadn’t seen it coming, and the weight of it left me reeling. I found myself questioning how we had strayed so far off track and wondering what we could have done differently.

Healing wasn’t just about addressing the mistake itself—the loss of Matt’s license, the move, or the ripple effects on our family. It also forced us to confront the deep wound of broken trust. Knowing that something so significant had been hidden from me cut deeper than I was prepared for, and it created additional friction between us that we couldn’t ignore.

While Matt and I worked through the fallout in our own ways, I wrestled with feelings of betrayal and sadness. Rebuilding wasn’t just about moving forward; it became a process of repairing trust, piece by fragile piece. Hurt like that doesn’t fade overnight. It demands time, honesty, and an enormous amount of grace—for him, for myself, and for us together.

Even with the challenges, we chose to see this season as an opportunity—a chance to reset, refocus, and rebuild. The path hasn’t been easy, but it has required us to let go of the need to have all the answers and instead commit to taking one step at a time, one day at a time, always together.

What Rebuilding Looks Like for Us

Rebuilding isn’t glamorous. It’s messy, raw, and often filled with hard conversations and uncomfortable truths. There have been more tears than I can count. But even in the midst of all that, this season has also brought glimpses of grace, hope, and growth that remind us why we’re fighting to move forward.

Here’s what this journey looks like for us right now:

1. Focusing on Family First

Our family has become the foundation of everything we’re rebuilding. That means learning to show up for each other even when emotions are high and wounds are fresh. We’ve had to be intentional about creating routines that bring stability to our kids, even on days when Matt and I are struggling with our own emotions.

Open and honest communication has become non-negotiable. We talk with our kids about the challenges we’re facing in age-appropriate ways, and Matt and I are working hard to model what it looks like to face struggles together, with honesty and humility.

2. Rebuilding Trust in Our Marriage

The hardest part of this season has been the work Matt and I have done as a couple. Rebuilding trust after it breaks requires immense effort. The hurt cuts deep, and we’ve both had to confront it directly.

This process demands constant listening, unwavering honesty, and a shared commitment to rebuild our relationship piece by piece. Forgiveness isn’t something you choose once; it’s a decision we make every day. Some days feel easier than others, but we remain determined to move forward together, even when the path feels challenging.

The Hidden Struggles Behind the Scenes

Matt and I have been married for 12 years, a journey marked by highs, lows, and everything in between. The mistake that happened wasn’t small; it was the kind of event that can tear couples apart. To clarify, this wasn’t infidelity or anything of that sort. It stemmed from a series of poor financial decisions and compromised choices, made because Matt found himself in a position where he was forced to choose between meeting our family’s needs and doing what was right.

The pain it caused created distance, fueled resentment and brought heartbreak that seemed impossible to overcome.

These struggles often remain hidden from the outside world. To others, we might appear as though we have it all together. People assume everything is fine because we’ve learned how to show up, smile, and keep moving forward. The reality, however, is far different. There were moments when we were barely holding on—moments when the weight of it all felt crushing and left us questioning whether we could make it through.

Facing the Pain and Choosing to Stay

What made it even harder were the comments and beliefs tied to the idea that, as a married couple, we are “one.” While I respect and understand the biblical foundation of that unity, it was said that Matt’s mistake was my mistake too. But I can’t fully agree with that. His actions were his own, and while they deeply impacted us both, they weren’t something I caused or participated in. That belief added a layer of pain I wasn’t prepared for and made an already difficult situation even more complicated.

By the grace of God and the foundation laid by our upbringing, we somehow managed to hold it all together. But that doesn’t mean it was easy—far from it. There were moments when it felt like we were hanging on by a thread, moments when one or both of us thought about walking away. There were nights of silence, days filled with tension, and times when we wondered if we had anything left to give to each other.

Yet, through it all, we kept choosing to stay. To fight for what we had built. To believe that healing was possible, even when it felt out of reach. Holding it together didn’t mean pretending everything was perfect. It meant being willing to face the broken pieces and work together to rebuild them—no matter how messy or painful the process might be.

3. Setting Long-Term Goals

We have focused on moving forward by setting clear, tangible goals for the future. For us, this means achieving financial freedom, planning for a home of our own, and building a strong foundation for our kids’ futures.

The road ahead feels overwhelming at times. The distance between where we are and where we want to be can seem daunting. But these goals keep us grounded and provide a sense of direction. They give us something to work toward as a family, even when challenges arise.

This journey has also driven us to share openly about the raw, unfiltered reality of raising kids and navigating life’s hardships. Many versions of our story have been shared from different perspectives. While we understand those perspectives exist, we feel strongly about sharing our journey in our own voice.

Our intention is not to stir hurt or cause division but to offer honesty about where we are and how we are working to rebuild. Through transparency, we hope to encourage others who might feel alone in their struggles. If there’s one thing we’ve learned, it’s that connection and healing come from stepping into the light, even when it feels uncomfortable.

4. Leaning Into Faith

Our faith has endured challenges we never anticipated. Trusting God as life falls apart hasn’t been easy, but it has grounded and anchored us throughout this season.

We place our trust in Him, even when the “why” remains unclear. Prayer and scripture provide daily reminders of His grace and strength, becoming essential for not only rebuilding our lives but also healing our hearts.

Matt and I have always leaned toward introversion, but the events we’ve faced have caused us to retreat even further. Letting people into our lives feels riskier now, knowing how easily relationships can unintentionally cause hurt. Right now, we are prioritizing what matters most: the physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being of our family and its future.

If we seem less present or show up differently than we once did, please know it’s not about anyone else. We are intentionally creating the space we need to heal and regroup as a family. This season demands our full attention, and we deeply appreciate the patience and understanding of those who care about us.

The Lessons We’re Learning

This season has been filled with hard-earned lessons:

  • Grace Matters: We’ve had to learn to extend grace to ourselves and each other. Mistakes don’t define us—how we choose to move forward does.
  • Humility Is a Gift: Living with my parents again has been humbling, but it’s also reminded us of the power of starting over with help.
  • Trust Takes Time: Rebuilding trust isn’t a quick process. It’s built through consistent actions, honesty, and a willingness to confront the hard stuff together.
  • Faith Isn’t Easy, but It’s Worth It: Trusting God through uncertainty is challenging, but it’s also what sustains us when everything else feels shaky.

A Work in Progress

We haven’t reached the finish line yet. Truthfully, I’m not even sure what the finish line looks like. What I do know is this: rebuilding doesn’t require perfection. It demands showing up every day, even when it’s hard. It’s about choosing hope over despair and consistently taking small, intentional steps forward.

If you’re in a season of rebuilding, remember—you’re not alone. The process is messy and painful, but it also holds the potential for growth, healing, and grace. Let’s navigate this journey together, one step at a time.

A Season of Healing and Hope

This season of life has been heavy, but it’s also been one of reflection, growth, and hope. We’re learning that rebuilding doesn’t happen overnight—it’s a series of small, deliberate steps. And while the process isn’t easy, it’s teaching us the value of grace, perseverance, and faith.

If you’re in a season of rebuilding, whether it’s your marriage, your family, or even just yourself, know that you’re not alone. Healing is possible, even in the messiest and most painful moments. Lean into grace, take it one step at a time, and remember that progress, no matter how small, is still progress.

Let’s keep the conversation going! If this post resonated with you, you might also find these resources helpful:

We’d love to hear from you—what’s been your greatest lesson in seasons of rebuilding? Share in the comments or connect with us through the links above. Together, we can find strength and encouragement for the journey ahead. ❤️

guilt
Family Life

Dealing with Parental Guilt: Letting Go of the Perfect Parent Myth

by Denise Wright

Dealing with Parental Guilt and Letting Go

Parenthood is one of the most rewarding journeys, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges—one of the biggest being parental guilt. Whether it’s feeling like you’re not spending enough time with your kids, questioning a disciplinary decision, or comparing yourself to other parents, guilt can creep in and weigh you down.

The good news is that you’re not alone. Guilt is something every parent faces, but it doesn’t have to control your parenting journey. Let’s explore why guilt happens, how it affects us, and most importantly, practical ways to let it go and focus on what truly matters.

Understanding Parental Guilt

Guilt is an emotion all parents experience at some point. It often stems from high expectations, societal pressure, or our own inner voices telling us we’re falling short. Here are some common examples you might relate to:

  • You forgot to pack their lunch for school.
  • You missed their big game or recital because of a work deadline.
  • You snapped at them after a long and stressful day.

These moments are inevitable, but they don’t define your worth as a parent. Guilt can actually be a sign of how much you care. However, when left unchecked, it can spiral into feelings of inadequacy or even lead to burnout.

The Impact of Comparison on Guilt

One of the biggest contributors to parental guilt is comparison. It’s easy to look at other parents on social media or in your community and feel like you’re not measuring up. But here’s the truth: what you see is only a highlight reel.

Every family has its struggles, and comparing yourself to others only magnifies feelings of guilt. Instead, focus on your unique strengths and what works best for your family.

How to Let Go of the Guilt: Practical Tips

1. Reframe Your Perspective

Instead of viewing guilt as a sign of failure, see it as a reminder of your love for your kids. Acknowledge the feeling, but don’t let it consume you.

For example, if you missed a school event, remind yourself of the countless other ways you’ve shown up for your child. Focus on the bigger picture rather than one isolated moment.

2. Embrace Imperfection

Perfection doesn’t exist in parenting, and chasing it will only leave you exhausted. Embrace the fact that mistakes are a natural part of the journey.

For instance, if you forget something important, own up to it. Apologizing and taking responsibility can teach your children valuable lessons about accountability and resilience.

3. Focus on Quality Over Quantity

It’s not about how much time you spend with your kids but the quality of that time.

Turn off distractions and be fully present during the moments you share. Whether it’s a family game night, bedtime stories, or a quick chat about their day, these intentional interactions leave lasting impressions.

4. Practice Self-Compassion

Would you criticize a fellow parent for making the same mistakes you do? Of course not. So why hold yourself to impossible standards?

Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d extend to a friend. Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough.

5. Communicate with Your Kids

Open communication is a powerful tool for building trust and alleviating guilt.

If you feel guilty about losing your temper, apologize and explain why. For example: “I’m sorry for yelling earlier. I was feeling overwhelmed, but that’s no excuse. Let’s talk about what happened and how we can handle it better next time.”

This not only models accountability but also shows your kids that it’s okay to express emotions in a healthy way.

Additional Strategies for Letting Go of Guilt

  1. Create a Support Network
    Parenting wasn’t meant to be done alone. Surround yourself with people who uplift you and remind you of your worth. This could be fellow parents, close friends, or even online communities where you can share experiences and advice.
  2. Celebrate Small Wins
    Instead of dwelling on what you didn’t do, focus on the small victories. Did you get the kids to school on time? Did you share a laugh over dinner? These moments matter more than you realize.
  3. Focus on Gratitude
    Shift your perspective by focusing on what you’re grateful for in your parenting journey. Gratitude can transform guilt into appreciation for the moments you’ve been given.
  4. Teach Your Kids About Grace
    When you extend grace to yourself, you teach your kids to do the same—for themselves and for others. This creates a culture of understanding and forgiveness in your home.

The Impact of Letting Go of Guilt

Letting go of guilt allows you to be more present and intentional in your parenting. It clears the emotional clutter, giving you space to focus on what truly matters.

Your kids don’t need you to be perfect—they need you to be present. By releasing unrealistic expectations, you’ll find greater joy in the little moments and build stronger, more authentic connections with your children.

The Ripple Effect on Your Family

When you let go of guilt, you also create a healthier environment for your children. They learn that it’s okay to make mistakes, as long as they learn and grow from them. This mindset builds resilience and emotional intelligence, equipping them to navigate life’s challenges with confidence.

Moving Forward as a Parent

Dealing with parental guilt is an ongoing process, but every step you take to let it go makes a difference. Parenting isn’t about being perfect; it’s about showing up, learning, and growing alongside your children.

Need more support? Check out our post on 10 Tips for Strengthening Family Bonds for more ideas on creating meaningful connections with your kids.

Let’s embrace progress over perfection—together.

ideas for family
Family Foundations

Ideas for Building Resilient Kids: Strengthening Emotional Foundations for Your Family

by Denise Wright

Introduction

Raising emotionally strong kids can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. If you’re searching for ideas for your family to build resilience, create stronger connections, and help your kids face life’s challenges with confidence, you’re in the right place.

In this post, we’ll explore practical tips, real-life examples, and simple strategies to help your kids grow emotionally while strengthening your family bond. Because when kids learn to manage emotions and overcome obstacles, they don’t just bounce back—they thrive.

1. Creating a Safe Space for Emotions

Building emotional resilience starts with teaching your kids that their feelings are valid and welcome.

  • Listen First: Encourage your child to share what’s on their mind without jumping in to “fix” the problem. Sometimes, they just need to feel heard.
  • Model Emotional Awareness: When you’re frustrated, say things like, “I’m feeling upset right now, but I’m going to take a deep breath and calm down.” Kids learn resilience by watching us handle our own emotions.
  • Tools for Younger Kids: Consider a feelings chart for younger children to name their emotions, or perhaps a journal for older kids over the age of 7.

This is especially important in our household because our daughter Addison experiences a wide range of emotions on a regular basis. Every day, we’re learning a little more about how to help her regulate her feelings, process things that upset her, and prepare for situations that might trigger strong reactions.

Though she’s the loudest in our house and a constant chatterbox, Addison is also incredibly sensitive. She reacts strongly to certain noises, has specific preferences for clothing textures, and is very particular about the foods she eats. Understanding her unique needs has been a journey, but it’s teaching us so much about patience, empathy, and creating an environment where she feels supported.

2. Teaching Problem-Solving Skills

When life gets tough, kids need to know how to work through challenges rather than avoid them.

  • Encourage Independent Thinking: Next time your child has a problem, ask questions like, “What do you think we should do?” or “What are a couple of solutions you can try?”
  • Break It Down: Help kids tackle challenges step by step so they don’t feel overwhelmed.
  • Celebrate Effort Over Outcomes: Remind your kids that trying and failing is often how we grow the most.

✨ Practical Tip: Start a family mantra like “In this family, we try, learn, and try again!”

3. Prioritizing Connection in Your Family

Strong emotional bonds help kids feel secure enough to handle life’s ups and downs. In our family, we’ve found that creating these bonds doesn’t require grand gestures—it’s often the little moments of connection that make the biggest difference. Whether it’s sitting down together for a meal, laughing over a shared joke, or simply being present when emotions run high, these everyday interactions build a foundation of trust and love.

One way we’ve worked on strengthening these connections is by being intentional about how we spend time together. Activities like family game nights or taking time to really listen to what our kids are saying have become simple but meaningful ways to create stability and connection.

There are many ways to strengthen your family’s bonds, from creating special traditions to finding small ways to show support every day. These efforts, no matter how small, provide kids with the stability and security they need to navigate life’s challenges with confidence.

These small, intentional efforts don’t just make kids feel loved—they give them the emotional security they need to face challenges with confidence.

  • Family Traditions Matter: Whether it’s weekly family game nights or bedtime chats, routines build connection and consistency.
  • Spend One-on-One Time: Even 10-15 minutes of focused time with each child can make a big difference. Ask about their day, dream with them, or simply share a laugh.

4. Teaching Healthy Coping Strategies

One of the best ideas for your family is helping your kids learn how to manage stress and disappointment in healthy ways.

  • Breathe Through It: Teach your kids simple deep breathing exercises to calm their minds.
  • Physical Outlets: Encourage activities like walking, biking, or playing outside when emotions run high.
  • Create a Calm-Down Space: Set up a cozy corner with soft blankets, books, and stress relief tools such as a box of sensory fidgets for kids who need a break.

In the end, even adults sometimes need a moment to cool down and breathe before reacting or engaging. In fact, I’d go a step further and suggest that those who are quick to react at the drop of a hat likely didn’t have someone teach them healthier ways to cope with their emotions growing up.

I’ll be honest—I struggle with reacting before I think, and I’ve noticed my kids have picked up on that habit too. But the fact that I can acknowledge it gives me hope—for their future and my own. After all, the first step to solving any problem is recognizing that it exists.

5. Practicing Gratitude as a Family

Gratitude shifts the focus from what’s missing to what’s already good in our lives—building a positive, resilient mindset.

  • Family Gratitude Jar: Have each family member write down one thing they’re grateful for each week and place it in the jar. At the end of the month, read them together.
  • Gratitude Journals: Encourage kids to list three “good things” each night before bed.
  • Model Thankfulness: Share your own moments of gratitude out loud.

✨ Reminder: Resilience grows when kids learn to look for the silver lining, even on tough days.

6. Celebrating Small Wins Together

Resilience isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Celebrate the effort your kids put into growing, trying, and learning.

  • Call Out the Little Things: Did your child try something new, stick with a tough task, or handle a disappointment well? Celebrate it!
  • Create a Family Wins Jar: Write down victories big and small, from “finished my chores without complaining” to “I stayed calm when I felt frustrated.”

Matt and I created an eBook that dives deep into Celebrating the Wins (Big and Small) and is packed with great ideas to help you do just that. Want a copy? Subscribe to Our Family Experiment today, and we’ll send you the eBook for free! It’s our way of saying thank you for joining us on this journey.

Conclusion: Resilience Starts at Home

Fostering emotional resilience in your kids isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about showing up, offering grace, and creating space for them to learn, grow, and bounce back stronger. These ideas for your family can help you build a foundation of emotional strength that will carry your kids through the challenges life throws their way.

Remember, small efforts add up. Every time you connect with your kids, celebrate their progress, or model resilience in your own life, you’re equipping them with tools they’ll carry for a lifetime.

Want more ideas to help your family thrive?

  • Subscribe to Our Family Experiment for real-life parenting tips, relatable stories, and exclusive updates.
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Don’t forget to download your FREE eBook, Parenting Without a Playbook: Grace, Not Perfection, when you subscribe! We will send it straight to your email within minutes!

Faith and Family

How to Manage Parenting Stress During the Holidays

by Denise Wright

The holidays are a magical time, but let’s be honest—they can also make it difficult to manage parenting stress, inevitably taking things to a whole new level. Between coordinating schedules, shopping for gifts, and managing the inevitable sugar-induced meltdowns, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. But don’t worry—you’re not alone, and there are ways to handle the chaos while still enjoying the season.

1. Plan Ahead to Tame Holiday Stress

One of the best ways to start managing stress is to get ahead of the chaos. Use a family calendar or planner to organize events, shopping lists, and meal plans. When everything is written down, it’s easier to see what’s coming up and avoid last-minute panic.

This is something Matt and I have started doing since being back in Oklahoma, living with family especially. Not only do we need to keep track of our own lives, but on occasion, we have to keep up with my parents as well. It’s hard for anyone, let alone busy parents to remember all the things! We started using the See It Bigger Padfolio Planner to help us stay on track with everything from shower schedules to doctor appointments. We can replace the insert every year which makes it convenient. Don’t make it harder than it has to be. Work smarter, not harder! Anything you can do to help manage parenting stress should be a top priority in my opinion!

2. Simplify Your Gift-Giving

You don’t have to do it all! Stick to a simple gift-giving formula, like the popular “Something they want, something they need, something to wear, something to read.” This not only reduces holiday stress but also keeps the budget in check.

I enjoy giving gifts, but don’t you dare ask me what I want or need because I don’t have a clue! As a mom, I’m always thinking about what everyone else wants or needs. I used to get so irritated with my mom when I was younger and would ask her to tell me what she wanted for Christmas or her birthday. She’d say, “I have no idea.” Now here I am… Mrs. I have no idea Jr.

However, when I’m stuck I enjoy visiting Etsy. There is always something there for everyone! I’d tell you what we’re getting the kids and each other… but we all read this blog. So I won’t spoil any surprises. 😉

3. Take Breaks to Recharge

As parents, we’re often so focused on making the holidays perfect for everyone else that we forget about ourselves. Schedule small breaks for self-care—even if it’s just 10 minutes to enjoy a cup of tea or read a book.

For Matt and me, living in someone else’s home makes it challenging to find a quiet space. So, we’ve turned our bedroom into a little getaway suite, complete with my Xbox and TV and Matt’s gaming PC. Most evenings, after the kids are asleep, we unwind together by playing our favorite games and chatting about our day.

It’s honestly my favorite time of the day—especially now that Matt added a wax warmer to his desk that looks like a miniature fire burning! It sets such a cozy, relaxing mood in the room and fills the air with all the holiday scents we love.

4. Delegate and Ask for Help

Remember, you don’t have to do everything alone. Enlist your partner, kids, or extended family to pitch in with decorating, wrapping, or cooking. Sharing the load can reduce parenting stress significantly. Which reminds me… If I don’t put up the kids’ miniature Christmas tree this weekend for them to decorate, they might never let me live it down!

This week in Children’s Church the kids’ teacher brought them each these scratch art ornaments to design however they wanted. I was blown away when my 11-year-old son brought his ornament to show me after church. Nobody suggested to him what to scratch into this ornament, but they had just been learning about the Virgin Mary and her Virgin birth. Didn’t the kids do such a good job?!

5. Prioritize Family Time

It’s easy to get caught up in the busyness, but some of the most cherished memories are the simplest ones. Set aside time for family traditions, like baking cookies or watching a favorite holiday movie together. These moments can ease holiday stress and bring joy to everyone. Do what works for you and your family.

My mother is great about pulling the kids into the kitchen to help her bake cookies. She’s already started her holiday baking spree to hand out trays of cookies to her neighbors. DO NOT touch the cookies. That’s a really difficult thing to do when she so rudely makes it smell like a holiday baker’s market in here. I prefer to do things outside of the kitchen with my kids because the kitchen is my space. HA! This is how I manage parenting stress. I avoid moments that are bound to cause me stress because I know myself pretty well.

Haven’t developed any of your own family traditions for the holidays? I’ll let you borrow one of ours! We love going to our local grocery store and picking up a gingerbread house-making kit to do together. We’ve even been known to order a special kit online a time or two. Check out this adorable gingerbread barn. Or if you’re like me and aren’t a fan of the taste of gingerbread… this chocolate cookie house is a must!

6. Keep Expectations Realistic

Not everything has to be perfect. The tree doesn’t need to look like it belongs in a magazine, and it’s okay if the cookies come out a little burnt. Embrace the imperfections—they’re often the moments you’ll laugh about later.

This is one I’m still working on, to be honest. My nerves and OCD get the better of me. Not gonna lie, I’ve been refraining from adjusting the garland on my mother’s Christmas tree because it isn’t evenly placed toward the bottom. THE GAP IS TO MUCH! I digress. As I was saying… not everything has to be perfect. HA!

Pro-tip: maybe write that on your hand this holiday season so you don’t forget.

7. Focus on Gratitude

During the hectic moments of the holiday season, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of to-do lists, gift shopping, and family gatherings. But when you feel overwhelmed, take a step back and reflect on what truly matters—what you’re grateful for. The holidays are about so much more than the presents we give or receive; they’re about celebrating the ultimate gift given to all of us—the birth of Jesus Christ.

This season is an opportunity to remember God’s incredible love for us, demonstrated in the gift of His Son, who came to bring hope, joy, and salvation. Share this profound truth with your family as you talk about what you’re thankful for. Encourage your kids to think about the blessings in their lives and how they can share that same love and kindness with others.

By grounding your family in gratitude and focusing on the real reason for the season, you can create a holiday filled with meaning, connection, and joy. After all, it’s not about the gifts under the tree, but the gift of grace that was given to us all. ✨

Closing Thoughts to Manage Parenting Stress

The holidays don’t have to be perfect to be memorable. If you think about it, your most memorable holiday moments probably weren’t these grand expensive gestures. But the simple smell of Grandma baking a card table full of homemade pies or riding on your brand new bean bag down the basement stairs with your siblings hoping mom doesn’t stop you.

By taking a step back, planning ahead, and prioritizing what truly matters, you can enjoy the season while keeping parenting stress at bay. Remember, the best gift you can give your family is a happy, present version of yourself.

If these tips resonate with you, share your own strategies for managing parenting stress during the holidays by sending us a quick email to [email protected]. Let’s navigate this season together!

From Our Family Experiment to yours… Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

grounded in parenting
Faith and Family

5 Ways to Stay Grounded During Parenting Challenges

by Denise Wright

Parenting is one of life’s greatest joys, but it’s also one of its toughest challenges. There are days when nothing seems to go as planned—tantrums erupt, schedules fall apart, and patience is tested to its limits. Staying grounded during parenting challenges is crucial for your peace of mind and your family’s well-being. Here are five tips we try to follow to help navigate the tough times with grace and resilience.

1. Start with Self-Care to Stay Grounded in Parenting

It’s easy to put yourself last when juggling the demands of family life. However, neglecting self-care can leave you feeling drained and overwhelmed. Even small steps like walking, journaling, or spending five quiet minutes can make a big difference. And let’s be honest—we’ve all escaped to the bathroom behind a locked door at least once! We parents do what we gotta do to stay grounded in parenting. Am I right?

The truth is, you can’t pour from an empty cup. If your cup is empty, no one is going to be happy.

Tip for parents: Schedule self-care moments like an appointment you can’t miss. When you care for yourself, you’ll be better equipped to tackle parenting challenges.

2. Lean on Your Support System

Parenting isn’t meant to be done alone. A spouse, family member, friend, or fellow parent can be invaluable when you need advice or simply a listening ear.

I’ll admit, as a wife and mother, it’s not always easy to be on the listening end when my spouse vents. I’ve failed countless times by taking his words too personally. But I’ve learned that he needs the same things I do—grace, understanding, and a safe space to say, “I’m overwhelmed, overstimulated, and overworked.”

Stay grounded: Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Whether it’s delegating tasks or venting to someone who understands, leaning on others can lighten the load.

3. Focus on What You Can Control

Parenting throws curveballs—unexpected meltdowns missed appointments, or sudden changes in plans. Instead of stressing over what’s out of your control, focus on what you can manage.

For example, you might not be able to stop your child’s tantrum immediately, but you can control your response—calm and empathetic instead of reactive.

I often remind myself that kids are still learning how to handle their emotions and anxieties. I’m almost 35 years old, and I’m still learning how to cope with my anxieties. Our kids deserve the same respect we demand from them.

Just today, my kids were arguing over something trivial because neither was truly listening to the other. I finally said, “Guys, slow down and listen to each other. You’re making a big deal out of nothing. It’s called respect—try it.”

Parenting challenges become less overwhelming when you focus on your actions rather than the external chaos.

4. Practice Gratitude in the Chaos

When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to lose sight of the good. Taking a moment to reflect on what you’re grateful for can shift your perspective. Gratitude doesn’t erase challenges, but it helps you focus on the bigger picture.

I often watch my kids and reflect on growing up with my brothers. After losing my older brother when I was nine, I tell my kids often, “What I’d give for just one more minute with him. Don’t waste time arguing over things that won’t matter tomorrow.”

At the end of the day, family is what matters most. Challenges are just a part of life, but we have so much to be thankful for.

Tip for parents: Keep a gratitude journal. Jot down three things each day that brought you joy, no matter how small. For example:

  1. I had an amazing sandwich at lunch.
  2. The kids and I shared a hilarious moment of uncontrollable laughter.
  3. I spent a peaceful moment admiring the twinkling lights on the Christmas tree.

5. Turn to Faith and Reflection to Stay Grounded in Parenting

For many parents, faith provides strength during hard times. Prayer, meditation, or reading scripture can bring peace amidst the chaos and help keep you grounded in parenting. Proverbs 22:6 reminds us, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Even on the hardest days, your efforts are building a foundation for your child’s future.

If you’re unsure how to lean on faith or want to learn more about having a relationship with God, we’d love to help. Reach out to us—we’d be honored to walk with you on this journey.

Stay grounded: Reflect on the values you want to instill in your children. If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.

Remember, Challenges Are Temporary

No matter how tough parenting feels right now, it won’t last forever. By staying grounded, you’ll help yourself and model resilience for your kids. Parenting challenges test us, but they also provide opportunities for growth and deeper connection.

What’s Your Go-To Tip?
How do you stay grounded during parenting challenges? We’d love to hear your insights—share them with us at [email protected]!