giving yourself grace as a parent
Family Life

Feeling Overwhelmed? How to Give Yourself Grace When Life Gets Tough

by Denise Wright

Life Happens—And Sometimes, So Does the Flu

This past week has been a complete whirlwind. I had plans—big plans. A new podcast episode to record, a newsletter to send, blog posts to write, announcements to make. But instead? I got sick. And just as I started feeling human again, my daughter got sick too. The flu hit our house hard, and everything I had scheduled came to a screeching halt.

Saturday came, and with the kids away all day, recording the podcast wasn’t an option. Then Sunday hit, and the moment we got home from church, it felt like one thing after another kept piling up—like a snowball rolling downhill, getting bigger with every turn.

By Monday morning, I turned to Matt and admitted, “I just don’t have it in me. I have to put everything on pause this week.” And sure enough, I started feeling even worse.

Tuesday rolled around, and there was no improvement. That’s when Matt jumped into action, throwing every vitamin and remedy he could think of at me, determined to help me bounce back.

Then came Wednesday morning. Addison walked into our bedroom, her face pale, and said, “I don’t feel good.” Oops. I had officially passed it on.

Since then, she’s been sleeping almost nonstop, and honestly, she’s had it worse than I did. Bless her heart, our girl is down for the count.

I don’t know about you, but when things don’t go as planned, I tend to spiral into frustration. I feel like I’m falling behind, like I’m failing at everything, and like I should be pushing through no matter what. But if this week has taught me anything, it’s this:

Rest Is Not a Failure

As parents, we constantly pour into our families—our time, our energy, our attention. And when we can’t show up the way we want to, we tend to feel guilty. But the truth is, our bodies are not machines. They need rest. They need care. And when we push through sickness or exhaustion just to check off a to-do list, we’re not helping anyone.

If I had forced myself to push through this week, I would have ended up even sicker, even more exhausted, and let’s be honest—probably even more cranky. That wouldn’t have served my family, and it certainly wouldn’t have served me.

The Guilt of Falling Behind

I’ll admit it—there’s a part of me that keeps whispering, You should have done more. The podcast went unrecorded, the newsletter never got sent, and half of my plans fell by the wayside.

But you know what? That’s okay.

Life isn’t a race to perfection. It’s messy. It’s unpredictable. And sometimes, it means we have to press pause whether we want to or not.

The Lesson I’m Taking Away

This past week forced me to slow down and reminded me that my worth isn’t measured by my productivity. I’ve also watched Matt—who has been a force to be reckoned with these past few months—struggle to balance his work while constantly tending to Addison and me.

At one point, when I finally started to feel a little normal again, I looked at him and said, “It doesn’t matter how much money you bring in or don’t bring in today, honey. What matters is that you took care of your family. Some days, that means providing for our financial needs. On other days, it’s taking care of our physical needs. No matter what… you’ve been amazing. I see you. And I appreciate you more than you know.”

This week reminded me that resting isn’t a sign of weakness—it’s a necessity. And that giving myself grace isn’t just something I encourage others to do—it’s something I have to actively practice myself.

So if you’ve had a week (or a month) where things didn’t go as planned, I want to remind you: You are not behind. You are not failing. You are human. And sometimes, the best thing you can do is take a breath, reset, and give yourself the grace to move forward at your own pace.

Let’s Talk About It

Have you ever had a time when life forced you to slow down? How did you handle it? Send us your thoughts to [email protected]

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A family of four in their home after a quarrel, highlighting the need for alone time for parents to recharge and reconnect.
Family Life

Alone Time for Parents: Why Is it Important?

by Denise Wright

Introduction: Why Alone Time Matters for Parents

Parenting is a full-time job that doesn’t come with breaks, and as much as we love our kids, the constant demands can be exhausting. That’s why alone time for parents isn’t just a luxury—it’s a necessity.

This week, Matt and I are making it a priority to carve out some much-needed time together with a date night while the kids stay the night with family. After a particularly rough week, we realized just how overstimulated and overdue we are for some quiet, intentional time to recharge and reconnect—not just for ourselves, but for the well-being of our family as a whole.

In this post, I’ll share why alone time is so crucial for parents, how it benefits your marriage and your kids, and practical tips to make it happen, even with a busy schedule.

Recognizing the Signs of Burnout and Overstimulation

Last week was tough. Both Matt and I could feel the weight of burnout and overstimulation taking a toll on us. It wasn’t just the physical exhaustion—it was the emotional edge that crept into everything we did. The smallest things became triggers, and we found ourselves snapping over things that wouldn’t normally bother us.

It hit me hardest when I started saying things I didn’t really mean—things that came out of my frustration and desire to fix the situation. At one point, I even said, “Well, I’ll just take the kids and leave for a few hours so you don’t have to deal with us.” As soon as the words were out, I regretted them. I didn’t mean it, but it reflected just how drained I felt and how desperate I was for a solution.

Matt and I both recognize these signs of burnout now—the irritation, the short tempers, the way we withdraw from each other without meaning to. It’s not who we are at our core, but it’s a signal that we need to take a step back and prioritize our own well-being and connection.

We know that when we’re operating on empty, we’re not the parents or partners we want to be. And while it’s hard to admit when we’re at that breaking point, it’s necessary if we want to grow and move forward as a family.

Why Alone Time is Essential

Parenting is rewarding, but it’s also demanding. Without time to recharge, it’s easy to feel burnt out, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your partner. Alone time allows you to:

  • Recharge Your Energy: Taking time for yourself helps you refuel emotionally and mentally, so you can parent from a place of calm rather than exhaustion.
  • Strengthen Your Relationship: Spending intentional time with your partner helps you reconnect, build intimacy, and tackle parenting challenges as a team.
  • Set a Healthy Example: When your kids see you prioritizing self-care and your relationship, they learn the importance of balance and healthy boundaries.

How Alone Time Benefits Your Marriage

Date nights and quality time with your partner are more than just a chance to relax—they’re essential for maintaining a strong relationship. Here’s why:

  • Improved Communication: Without the distractions of daily life, you can focus on truly hearing and understanding each other.
  • Deeper Connection: Alone time lets you reconnect as individuals, not just as parents.
  • Shared Joy: Doing something fun or meaningful together reminds you why you fell in love in the first place.

For Matt and me, date nights are our way of hitting the reset button. This Friday, we’re taking the kids to stay with family so we can enjoy an evening just for us. It’s not extravagant, but it’s intentional—and that makes all the difference.

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Practical Tips for Making it Happen

Finding time for yourself or your partner isn’t always easy, but it’s worth the effort. Here are some practical ways to prioritize alone time:

  1. Schedule It In: Treat alone time like any other important appointment. Put it on the calendar and commit to it.
  2. Ask for Help: Don’t be afraid to lean on family or trusted friends for childcare. Most people are happy to help if you ask.
  3. Keep It Simple: Alone time doesn’t have to be elaborate. A quiet evening at home, a walk around the neighborhood, or coffee at your favorite spot can be just as meaningful as a night out.
  4. Make It Regular: Aim for consistency. Whether it’s a monthly date night or a weekly hour to yourself, regular alone time helps you recharge consistently.

Why It’s Good for Your Kids, Too

It’s easy to feel guilty about taking time for yourself, but the truth is, your kids benefit when you do. When parents take time to recharge and strengthen their relationship:

  • Kids see a model of healthy self-care.
  • They feel secure knowing their parents have a strong bond.
  • Parents return with more patience, energy, and joy to share with their children.

Recognizing the Need for a Pause

One of the biggest challenges we face as parents is the constant interruptions from our kids. Could Matt and I isolate ourselves to a single room and close the door? Sure. But somehow, they always find us. Whether it’s the endless questions, the persistent “mom” or “dad” calls, or even the sound of their footsteps coming down the hallway, it’s enough to feel overstimulating after a long day.

Adding to this challenge is the fact that we currently live with my parents. We don’t have a whole house to retreat to—just our bedroom, while the kids share a room of their own. The rest of the house is fair game for everyone. So even when we try to carve out a little space for ourselves, the reality is that there’s no real escape.

It’s not just the interruptions, though. It’s the way the kids argue in the next room, burst in needing something right when we’ve sat down for a conversation, or wander through the shared spaces looking for attention. Even when we love them with all our hearts, those moments can leave us feeling completely drained.

These are the signs we’ve learned to recognize—it’s our internal alarm system telling us it’s time for a pause. When everything feels too loud, too chaotic, and too constant, we know we need to step back, create intentional time for ourselves, and reset.

Prioritizing alone time as a couple isn’t about escaping the kids or neglecting our responsibilities—it’s about recharging so we can show up as the parents and partners we want to be. And sometimes, that means acknowledging that even the little things, like footsteps in the hallway or the lack of personal space, are reminders that we’re overdue for a break.

Conclusion: Prioritizing Alone Time is a Gift to Your Family

Alone time for parents isn’t selfish—it’s an investment in your well-being, your marriage, and your family as a whole. Taking even small moments to recharge allows you to show up as the best version of yourself for your kids and your partner.

This Friday, Matt and I are taking that time, and we couldn’t be more excited. Whether it’s a date night, a quiet walk, or an hour to yourself, I encourage you to find ways to prioritize alone time in your own life. You—and your family—will be better for it.

How do you prioritize alone time as a parent?

I’d love to hear your ideas in the comments. Let’s inspire each other to take care of ourselves and our relationships!

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A parent and child sitting together, talking about mental health.
Family Journey

How to Talk to Your Kids About Mental Health

by Denise Wright

Breaking the Silence Around Mental Health

Mental health can feel overwhelming. Talking to kids about mental health… even more so. But it’s one of the most important conversations parents can have. Whether it’s helping them understand their own emotions or teaching them how to support others, opening the door to these discussions early creates a foundation of empathy, understanding, and resilience.

In this post, we’ll explore practical tips for starting conversations about mental health with your children, making the topic approachable, and creating a safe space for them to express their feelings.

Why Talking to Your Kids About Mental Health Matters

Mental health impacts every aspect of our lives, from how we think and feel to how we interact with others. Helping kids understand the importance of mental health early on:

  • Normalizes the conversation and reduces stigma.
  • Encourages them to express their feelings and seek help when needed.
  • Teaches them to recognize signs of stress or anxiety in themselves and others.

Start the Conversation Early

You don’t need to wait for a “big moment” to talk about mental health. Everyday situations—like a bad day at school or a sibling argument—are great opportunities to introduce the topic.

Practical Tips:

  • Use age-appropriate language: For younger kids, explain feelings like sadness or worry in simple terms. For older kids, you can introduce concepts like stress or anxiety.
  • Lead by example: Share moments when you felt overwhelmed and how you managed those emotions.
  • Ask open-ended questions: Instead of “Are you okay?” try “How are you feeling about what happened?”

Create a Safe Space for Sharing

Kids need to feel safe to talk about their feelings without fear of judgment or punishment.

How to Create a Safe Space:

  • Be present: Put away distractions and focus on them during the conversation.
  • Validate their feelings: Let them know it’s okay to feel sad, angry, or scared.
  • Avoid jumping to solutions: Sometimes, they just need to be heard.

Teach Them Healthy Coping Strategies

It’s not enough to talk about mental health; kids also need tools to navigate their emotions.

Coping Strategies to Share:

  • Deep breathing exercises to manage stress.
  • Journaling to express feelings they might not want to say out loud.
  • Physical activity as a mood booster.
  • Creative outlets like drawing or music.

Know When to Seek Help

Sometimes, kids need more support than we can provide as parents. Teach them that it’s okay to ask for help.

Signs Your Child Might Need Professional Support:

  • Persistent sadness or worry that doesn’t go away.
  • Withdrawal from friends or activities they usually enjoy.
  • Trouble sleeping or changes in appetite.

If you notice these signs, reach out to a school counselor, pediatrician, or mental health professional.

Breaking the Cycle: Teaching What You Weren’t Taught

One of the hardest parts of raising kids to understand the importance of mental health is navigating it yourself—especially when it wasn’t something you grew up understanding. Mental health wasn’t openly discussed in my childhood. It wasn’t ignored, but it also wasn’t something we prioritized or even acknowledged. Instead, I learned to navigate my big feelings on my own, which often left me feeling overwhelmed and unsure of how to process what I was experiencing.

When I was a child, I faced significant loss that shaped me in ways I’m only beginning to understand. Losing my older brother to a tragic accident was devastating, and the grief felt unbearable at times. A year later, my older sister got married and moved out, leaving me as the oldest at home. It felt like my world shifted in the blink of an eye.

Without tools or guidance, I internalized a lot of those emotions. I didn’t know how to talk about the sadness, confusion, or even guilt I sometimes felt. I learned to keep going, to push through, and to cope in silence.

Now, as a parent, I see how those experiences shaped me. They taught me resilience, yes, but they also taught me to bury my feelings instead of addressing them. I don’t want that for my kids. I want them to know it’s okay to feel big emotions, to talk about their struggles, and to seek help when they need it.

What I’m Learning Along the Way:

  • It’s Okay Not to Have All the Answers: I remind myself that I don’t need to be an expert to start the conversation. Acknowledging mental health is an important first step.
  • Modeling Matters: Kids learn by watching us. When I take time to process my emotions or talk openly about struggles, I’m showing them that it’s okay to do the same.
  • Give Yourself Grace: Breaking generational cycles isn’t easy. There will be moments of doubt and missteps, but I try to focus on progress, not perfection.

By being open about my own learning process, I’m showing my kids that it’s never too late to prioritize mental health—and that even parents are still growing.

Keep the Conversation Going

Talking to your kids about mental health isn’t a one-time conversation—it’s an ongoing dialogue. By normalizing these discussions, providing a safe space, and teaching healthy coping strategies, we can help our kids develop the resilience they need to navigate life’s challenges.

Start small, stay consistent, and remember that it’s okay not to have all the answers. Most importantly, you’re showing up and starting the conversation.

How do you approach mental health conversations with your kids? Share your tips in the comments—we’d love to learn from you!

Encouraging Kids
Faith and Family

How Encouraging Kids Can Shape Their Future and Build Their Confidence

by Denise Wright

Parenting is filled with questions, but one of the most important is this: How can we help our kids become the best versions of themselves? Encouraging kids to follow their passions is a powerful way to support their growth, confidence, and happiness. But it’s not always easy. As parents, we walk the fine line between guiding them and allowing them to explore their interests.

In this post, I’m sharing practical, heartfelt advice on how to encourage your kids to pursue their passions and embrace who they’re meant to be.

Why Encouraging Kids to Pursue Their Passions Matters

Encouraging kids to follow their passions isn’t just about helping them find a hobby or career; it’s about nurturing their confidence and teaching them that their interests have value. When kids feel supported, they’re more likely to:

  • Take risks and try new things.
  • Develop resilience when faced with challenges.
  • Build a strong sense of self and identity.
  • Learn the importance of dedication and hard work.

Passions spark creativity and joy, and as parents, we have the privilege of fanning that flame.

Redefining Success: Preparing Our Kids for a Future Beyond the 9-to-5

For Matt and me, we’ve recently come to a profound realization about the future we’re setting up for our kids. We’re not just guiding them toward independence but also encouraging them to think beyond the traditional “career” path. In today’s world, where opportunities extend far beyond the typical 9-to-5 job, we want to prepare them to embrace flexibility, creativity, and self-reliance in how they approach work and life.

Matt and I are both content creators who work from home, and our careers are anything but conventional. Matt is an SEO writer, crafting articles that help businesses thrive online, and he’s also channeling his passion for storytelling into publishing several fictional books. On top of that, he joins me every week on our parenting podcast, where we share the ups, downs, and lessons of raising a family.

As for me, I’ve poured my heart into building and operating our family blog, a space where I connect with other parents to offer advice, share stories, and create resources. Together, our work reflects the kind of future we envision for our kids—one where they can pursue their passions, embrace creativity, and design a life that brings them joy and fulfillment.

By modeling this lifestyle, we hope to inspire our children to explore their interests and develop the skills they need to carve out their own unique paths. After all, the world is evolving, and so should the way we think about careers and success.

Signs Your Child Has Found a Passion

It can be exciting to watch your kids light up about something, but how do you know when they’ve truly found a passion? Look for these signs:

  1. They talk about it constantly.
    Whether it’s art, sports, or science, kids who are passionate will find every opportunity to bring it up. Currently, for our kids, it’s video games, their desire to create custom mods, and how the games can be improved.
  2. They dedicate free time to it.
    If your child willingly spends hours practicing, creating, or diving deeper into their interests, it’s a strong sign they’ve discovered something truly special. Our daughter Addison has recently been honing her drawing skills with the guidance of her cousins and grandfather. Creativity seems to run in my family—several relatives are talented artists, including one who achieved remarkable success as a portrait and sculptor artist. One of my uncle’s proudest moments and missed opportunities was being featured alongside Michael Jackson at his studio in Arizona. It’s inspiring to see Addison carry on this artistic legacy and make it her own.
  3. They show pride in their progress.
    Seeing them beam with pride over a new skill or achievement is a clear indicator that they’ve found something meaningful.

5 Ways to Encourage Your Kids to Follow Their Passions

1. Pay Attention to What Lights Them Up

The first step to encouraging kids is to observe. What excites them? What topics do they keep coming back to? Take note of the activities that spark their interest and ask open-ended questions like:

  • “What do you love about this?”
  • “How does it make you feel?”

Even if their current passion seems fleeting, showing interest tells them their feelings and experiences are valid.

2. Provide Opportunities to Explore

Sometimes, kids need hands-on experiences to truly discover their passions. Look for local classes, workshops, or clubs that align with their interests. For example:

  • If they love animals, consider a junior zookeeper program.
  • If they enjoy building, try a LEGO robotics camp.

These opportunities not only refine their skills but also show them that their passions are worth investing in.

3. Offer Support Without Taking Over

It’s easy to want to jump in and “help” when we see our kids exploring their passions. But there’s a fine line between supporting and taking over. Let your kids take the lead, and remember:

  • Encourage them to set their own goals.
  • Celebrate progress, not just achievements.
  • Be their cheerleader, not their manager.

For instance, if your child is passionate about drawing, provide the supplies and a dedicated space but let them decide what they want to create.

4. Share Stories of Perseverance

Kids need to understand that pursuing passions isn’t always easy. Share stories of people (including yourself!) who overcame obstacles to follow their dreams. Highlight lessons like:

  • Failure is a stepping stone to success.
  • Growth happens outside of your comfort zone.
  • Hard work often leads to the most rewarding results.
  • The things worth having in life take work and consistency.

These lessons help kids see challenges as opportunities rather than roadblocks.

5. Be Flexible and Open-Minded

Passions can evolve over time, and that’s okay! What your child loves today might not be their dream tomorrow. Encourage exploration and remind them it’s all part of the journey.

  • “It’s great that you’re curious about so many things.”
  • “Trying new interests helps you learn what you truly love.”

Early on Ethan was insistent that he wanted to grow up to be an engineer and design robots for a living. However, that has recently evolved into wanting to design wooden toys for children to play with. Only 11 years old and completely addicted to video gaming, I’m confident that his passion will only continue to evolve. One thing is for sure, he has a creative mind like his mama.

Addressing Parental Doubts

Sometimes, it’s hard not to question our kids’ interests, especially if they don’t align with our own. Maybe you’re unsure how a passion will translate into a career or worry they’re wasting time. Here’s the thing: passions are about joy and growth, not practicality. Trust that the skills they gain—like discipline, creativity, and resilience—will serve them no matter what.

What doesn’t always make sense to us as parents might make perfect sense to our kids. And honestly, that’s okay. They’re growing up in a world that’s constantly changing, one that looks vastly different from the one we knew even a decade ago.

How Things Used to Be

Take my husband, for example. Ten years ago, he made the bold decision to leave a traditional 9-to-5 job and pursue a career in writing while working from home—long before remote work became a mainstream concept. It wasn’t an easy decision, and it came with its fair share of criticism. His mom, bless her, had a hard time wrapping her head around it. She was raised in a generation where success was measured by climbing the corporate ladder and staying in a stable job for decades. To her, his choice seemed risky, even irresponsible.

What she couldn’t see at the time was the potential he saw in a new and evolving career path. Her concerns came from a place of love and a desire for him to succeed, but they were rooted in the mindset of her upbringing, not the changing opportunities of today. It wasn’t about doubting his abilities—it was about the fear of the unknown.

Fast forward to now, and that once unconventional decision has paid off in ways we couldn’t have imagined. It taught us an important lesson: just because something doesn’t align with the way we were raised or the rules we lived by doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Sometimes, it’s about trusting our kids to see possibilities we might miss and giving them the freedom to explore their own paths. After all, the world they’re navigating is theirs to shape, and it’s not always going to look like what we expect—or understand. And that’s okay.

How Faith Plays a Role in Encouraging Kids

For our family, faith is the foundation of everything we do, including how we parent. Encouraging kids to follow their passions includes reminding them that they are uniquely designed by God with talents and gifts meant to be nurtured. We often share Jeremiah 29:11 with our kids:

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

This verse reassures them (and us) that their passions have a purpose, even if we don’t fully understand it yet.

Our Personal Experience with Encouraging Passions

Let me share a story about Ethan and Addison. Ethan discovered his love for building when he was just five years old, using blocks to construct anything from castles to robots. We provided him with opportunities to explore, from LEGO kits to STEM classes. Today, he’s still passionate about creating, and it’s been incredible to watch him grow.

Addison, on the other hand, has a creative soul and loves crafting. While it’s not my forte, I’ve learned to embrace her glitter-covered projects because they bring her so much joy. Seeing her confidence grow has been worth every vacuuming session!

The Benefits of Encouraging Kids to Follow Their Passions

When you encourage your kids, you’re not just supporting their hobbies—you’re building their confidence, strengthening your bond, and helping them discover who they are. Here are some lasting benefits:

  • Emotional well-being: Kids who feel supported are happier and more secure.
  • Stronger relationships: Shared passions create opportunities for connection.
  • Life skills: From discipline to problem-solving, they’ll gain tools for future success.

Final Thoughts

Encouraging kids to follow their passions is one of the greatest gifts we can give as parents. It’s about showing them that their interests matter and helping them grow into confident, capable individuals. So whether it’s art, sports, science, or something else entirely, take the time to cheer them on—you won’t regret it.

Want more tips on supporting your kids’ growth and happiness? Check out our post on 10 Tips for Strengthening Family Bonds and subscribe to our newsletter for weekly parenting inspiration.

Christian Parenting Advice
Faith and Family

Why Consistency Is Key in Parenting

by Denise Wright

Parenting isn’t for the faint of heart, is it? From sleepless nights to the whirlwind of emotions that come with raising kids, every day can feel like an experiment. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned as a mom, it’s that consistency in parenting is a game-changer. It’s so important it’s included in our very first podcast releasing January 6, 2025!

It’s not always easy, and I’ll be the first to admit that my husband Matt and I still struggle with it from time to time. But when we’ve leaned into consistency—whether it’s with routines, rules, or expectations—the results have been undeniable. It brings stability to our family life and, more importantly, helps our kids feel secure.

In this post, I’ll share why consistency matters, how it benefits your kids (and your sanity), and practical ways to stay consistent, even when life gets hectic.

What Does Consistency in Parenting Look Like?

Consistency doesn’t mean you have to become a drill sergeant or run your household like a boot camp. It’s about setting clear expectations and following through on them—whether that’s with discipline, daily routines, or how you react to your kids’ behavior.

Here’s a simple example from our home: Bedtime. If we let bedtime slide by even 30 minutes, it throws off the entire night and, honestly, the next morning too. Consistency in our bedtime routine—wind down time, brushing teeth, hugs & kisses, bed—gives our kids the structure they need to wind down and sleep peacefully.

It’s not about being perfect; it’s about being predictable.

Why Consistency in Parenting Matters

1. Kids Thrive on Routine

Have you ever noticed how much smoother the day goes when your kids know what to expect? Routines provide a sense of security and help kids navigate their world with confidence.

For example, when our daughter Addison knows that Sundays mean family dinner and time with her older girl cousins, she has something to look forward to. It’s a small thing, but it makes her feel grounded and safe.

Consistency has been a challenge for us over the years, but it’s something we’re striving to improve on every single day. The reason it’s been such a struggle is a long story, but in short, we’ve moved houses so often throughout our kids’ lives that it’s felt like hitting the reset button every time. Each move has meant establishing new routines, adjusting to a new environment, and trying to blend our family dynamic with the dynamics of living with extended family. It’s been tough, but we’re learning and growing together.

2. Consistency Builds Trust

When you’re consistent, your kids know they can rely on you. Whether it’s sticking to a rule or keeping your promise, consistency builds trust and strengthens your relationship.

There have been times when I’ve had to remind myself that “no” has to mean “no,” even when it’s easier to give in. It’s hard in the moment, but it’s worth it when your kids learn that your words have weight.

Just this past week, while we had family visiting for the holidays, Addison and Ethan couldn’t stop bickering. Tensions were high, and with so many people around, it was hard to intervene effectively. Finally, I had enough and told them both that if they didn’t start treating each other with kindness and stop yelling, there would be consequences. In our house, that usually means a spanking—though it’s not a common occurrence, it has been necessary on rare occasions.

They both responded with their “Yes, ma’am’s,” but not much later, chaos erupted again. It felt like I was watching it unfold in slow motion, powerless to stop it in time. I was right in the middle of preparing the last dish for Christmas dinner when I put the knife down, turned around, and without hesitation, said to Addison, “I told you there would be consequences for screaming at your brother. I promised.”

As much as I hated it, I stopped everything, took her to her room, and gave her a small spanking. And you know what? It worked. They stopped screaming at each other after that.

It wasn’t a moment I enjoyed, but it was a reminder that when we set boundaries and follow through, it helps create a sense of structure and accountability.

3. It Reduces Anxiety

Uncertainty can be overwhelming for kids, especially when they’re little. Clear expectations and consistent reactions help reduce their anxiety. They don’t have to guess how you’ll respond or whether the rules will change.

Matt and I have seen this firsthand with our son Ethan. When we’re consistent with screen time rules, he’s less likely to push boundaries because he knows exactly what’s allowed and what isn’t.

How to Be Consistent Without Feeling Overwhelmed

1. Start Small

Don’t try to overhaul your entire parenting style overnight. Focus on one area where consistency could make the biggest impact, like bedtime routines or screen time limits.

Matt was sharing with me just the other day about a book he’s been listening to called The Slight Edge. The concept of the book is simple yet powerful: it emphasizes how successful people don’t necessarily make giant, life-altering changes all at once. Instead, they focus on being consistent in the small, seemingly insignificant things. Over time, these small, consistent actions create a ripple effect, ultimately building a strong foundation for a better future.

It’s not about perfection or big wins—it’s about the daily habits that may feel mundane or even trivial in the moment. Brushing your teeth, exercising for just 15 minutes a day, choosing water over soda—all of these small decisions compound over time, leading to big results. And the same principle applies to parenting.

For example, consistently setting aside 10 minutes each day to talk with your child or sticking to a bedtime routine might not feel groundbreaking in the moment. But over time, these consistent actions build trust, security, and stronger family bonds. The Slight Edge teaches us that success—whether in parenting, career, or personal goals—isn’t about the big leaps; it’s about the small steps we take every single day.

Hearing Matt talk about the book was a reminder for me to look at my own parenting through that lens. It’s easy to get caught up in wanting to fix everything all at once, especially when chaos seems to take over. But the truth is, real change comes from those small, intentional actions we take consistently. It’s a humbling realization, but also a hopeful one. Because when you focus on the little things, you’re not just getting through the day—you’re planting seeds for a brighter future for yourself and your family.

2. Communicate Clearly

Make sure your kids know what the rules and expectations are. Use age-appropriate language and explain the “why” behind your decisions.

For example, we’ve told our kids that limiting screen time isn’t about punishment—it’s about making sure they have time for other activities, like playing outside or doing crafts.

Don’t get me wrong—there are times when we give instructions and the kids, not liking what they hear, ask, “Why?” And let’s be honest, in those moments when we’re in the middle of our own thoughts or feeling overstimulated, we might default to the age-old response: “Because I said so.” And you know what? That’s okay… sometimes.

But most of the time, kids need to understand why we’re asking them to do—or not do—something. Why is that important? Well, because they’re still learning about life, how things work, and how to navigate the world. Curious minds are strong minds. And when we take the time to explain, we’re encouraging that curiosity, which is a critical part of their development.

Teaching them to question and seek understanding helps them grow into independent thinkers. It also sets the stage for a future where they don’t just accept everything at face value. Without that curiosity, they may grow up believing everything they hear simply because “someone said so.” So yes, sometimes “because I said so” is enough, but most times, it’s worth pausing to give them the why they’re searching for.

3. Involve Your Partner

Consistency works best when both parents are on the same page. Sit down with your partner and agree on the rules, consequences, and routines you want to prioritize.

Matt and I didn’t always do this well. In the early days of parenting, we’d accidentally send mixed messages to the kids because we hadn’t communicated with each other first. Now, we make it a point to have regular “parent meetings” to stay aligned.

Tell me your kids haven’t learned to work the system of going to mom, but if she says no, go to dad? Yeah… name me a kid who hasn’t tried that at least once. Be on the SAME PAGE!

4. Be Flexible When Needed

Consistency doesn’t mean rigidity. Life happens—there will be days when routines go out the window, and that’s okay. The key is to get back on track as soon as possible.

One summer, we took a last-minute road trip that completely derailed our usual schedules. Instead of stressing, we embraced the chaos and returned to our normal routines once we got home.

Common Challenges (and How to Overcome Them)

1. Feeling Like the Bad Guy

It’s tough to enforce rules when your kids are upset about them. But remember, consistency is an act of love. You’re teaching your kids important life skills, even if they don’t appreciate it in the moment.

2. Burnout

Parenting is exhausting, and staying consistent can feel like just one more thing on your plate. Give yourself grace, and don’t be afraid to lean on your partner, friends, or even a parenting group for support.

3. Pushback from Kids

Kids will test limits—it’s part of their job description. Stay calm, stand your ground, and remind yourself that consistency now will pay off in the long run.

Practical Tips for Creating Rules and Routines

  1. Use Visual Aids: A simple chart or calendar can help younger kids remember their daily routines.
  2. Set Clear Consequences: Be specific about what will happen if rules aren’t followed, and STICK TO IT!
  3. Celebrate Wins: Acknowledge when your kids follow the rules or stick to a routine. Positive reinforcement goes a long way.

The Long-Term Benefits of Consistency in Parenting

When you’re consistent, you’re not just making life easier today—you’re setting your kids up for success in the future. They’ll grow up with a strong sense of responsibility, self-discipline, and respect for others.

Parenting is hard work, in fact, the hardest job on the planet! But the effort you put into being consistent will pay off in the form of confident, well-adjusted kids.

Moving Forward Together

Consistency in parenting isn’t about being perfect—it’s about showing up, day after day, with love and intention. It’s about teaching your kids that they can trust you and that they are safe in the structure you provide.

So, parents, let’s commit to being consistent, not just for our kids but for ourselves. The journey might be challenging, but the rewards are worth it.

Need more parenting tips? Check out our post on 10 Tips for Strengthening Family Bonds.

boundaries
Parenting Tips

Building Healthy Boundaries with Your Kids for Stronger Family Relationships

by Denise Wright

Building Healthy Boundaries with Your Kids

Parenting is one of the most fulfilling yet challenging roles you’ll ever take on. One of the keys to fostering a harmonious family dynamic is setting clear and healthy boundaries with your kids. These are essential for teaching respect, building trust, and helping your children feel secure—all while preserving your own sanity.

In this post, we’ll explore why healthy limits matter, practical ways to establish them, and the long-term benefits for your family.

Why Setting Limits Matters

Healthy limits go beyond rules—they’re about fostering an environment where everyone feels valued, respected, and safe. They provide a clear framework for acceptable behavior, helping to reduce misunderstandings and prevent unnecessary conflict.

Building a Foundation for Respect
When kids understand what’s expected, they learn to respect others’ space, time, and emotions. This understanding helps them build better relationships with peers, teachers, and family members.

Encouraging Emotional Security
Clear expectations give children a sense of safety. When they know their boundaries and what to expect, they feel confident navigating the world. Structure isn’t restrictive—it’s a way of showing love and care.

Fostering Independence
Limits help kids develop self-discipline and decision-making skills. They learn to manage their emotions, responsibilities, and time—skills that will serve them for a lifetime.

Reducing Family Conflict
Without clear guidelines, misunderstandings can escalate into arguments. A structured approach helps resolve issues calmly and respectfully, maintaining peace at home.

How to Establish Healthy Boundaries with Your Kids

1. Set Clear Expectations

Children thrive on clarity. Instead of vague rules, be specific. For example:

  • Vague: “Be good at dinner.”
  • Clear: “At dinner, we sit at the table, use polite words, and wait for everyone to finish eating.”

2. Model the Behavior You Want to See

Children learn by example. If you want them to respect limits, demonstrate them yourself.

  • Respect personal space by knocking before entering their rooms.
  • Limit your own screen time if you expect them to do the same.

3. Involve Your Kids in the Process

When children contribute to setting family expectations, they’re more likely to respect them. Sit down together and discuss:

  • Why certain rules are important.
  • Consequences for breaking them.

For instance, if bedtime is a recurring issue, involve your child in creating a routine that works for both of you.

4. Use Positive Reinforcement

Celebrate when your kids follow the rules. Acknowledge their efforts with praise or small rewards, such as:

  • “You finished your chores on time—great job! Let’s pick a movie for family night.”

Positive reinforcement builds motivation and encourages continued cooperation.

5. Enforce Consequences Calmly

When rules are broken, consistent consequences are key. Avoid yelling or shaming—use a calm, firm tone to explain why the consequence is necessary.

  • Example: “You didn’t finish your homework, so no tablet time tonight. Let’s try again tomorrow.”

6. Be Flexible When Necessary

While consistency is important, there are times when flexibility is essential. If your child is having a rough day or facing unexpected stress, adjust the rules temporarily to show compassion.

Practical Examples for Common Situations

Screen Time

Technology often causes tension in families. To create balance:

  • Set specific screen time hours, such as after homework is done.
  • Create device-free zones during meals or in bedrooms.

Respecting Personal Space

Teach kids to knock before entering rooms or ask permission before borrowing items. Lead by example to reinforce this habit.

Chores and Responsibilities

Assign age-appropriate tasks that contribute to the household. Explain how their efforts make a difference for the entire family.

Balancing Family Time and Alone Time

While family time is crucial, everyone needs personal space to recharge. Encourage kids to communicate when they need quiet time and respect those boundaries.

Challenges in Maintaining Healthy Boundaries

Resistance from Kids

Children may test the limits to see if you’ll hold firm. Stay calm and consistent, reiterating the importance of the rules.

Guilt as a Parent

Enforcing rules can feel tough, especially if it upsets your kids. Remember, providing structure is an act of love that helps them grow into responsible adults.

Inconsistency

Life gets busy, and it’s easy to let things slide. Acknowledge when this happens and reestablish the rules as soon as possible.

The Benefits of Establishing Healthy Boundaries

Healthy limits benefit your family in countless ways:

  • Improved Communication: Clear expectations foster open dialogue.
  • Stronger Relationships: Mutual respect strengthens family bonds.
  • Life Skills: Kids learn essential skills like time management, respect, and accountability.
  • Reduced Stress: Knowing the limits provides a sense of security for everyone.

Moving Forward as a Family

Establishing healthy boundaries with your kids is an ongoing process that evolves as your family grows. It requires patience, clear communication, and a willingness to adapt.

Remember, these limits aren’t about control—they’re about creating a nurturing environment where everyone can thrive. By fostering respect, trust, and structure, you’re laying the foundation for a stronger, happier family.

Looking for more tips to strengthen your family bond? Check out our post on 10 Tips for Strengthening Family Bonds.

Message us on Facebook and/or TikTok for more relatable parenting advice and ideas to bring more calm into your family life.

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Family Bonding

How to Foster Open Communication with Your Kids: Parent-to-Parent Guide

by Denise Wright

Open communication is the foundation of a strong family bond, but as every parent knows, it’s far from easy. Navigating tough conversations and creating a safe space for kids to express themselves is a challenge we all face. That’s why we’re here to share practical, parent-to-parent tips for fostering honest dialogue within your family.

At Our Family Experiment, we pride ourselves on being open, raw, and honest with our readers and listeners. So, let me be real with you—communicating with kids doesn’t always go smoothly. Just last night, I tried to talk to Addison about something she needed help with, and it did not go well. She wouldn’t listen, got an attitude, and I ended up losing my cool and yelling at her.

Later, after stepping away from the situation, I realized I had failed—miserably. Swallowing my pride, I sat down with her to explain why I got upset and how we could avoid this in the future. It wasn’t easy, especially because my parents didn’t do that kind of thing when I was growing up. This wasn’t an action based on experience—it was based on what I wish had been done for me as a child.

I’ve heard baby boomers say over and over how anxiety attacks, panic attacks, or neurodivergence “weren’t an issue back in their day.” My goodness, just because something wasn’t named or talked about doesn’t mean it didn’t exist. Now, generations since that era are trying to navigate and name the challenges they’ve faced as adults and parents.

That said, as a Millennial with iGen kids, I’ve noticed some people take it to the other extreme. They over-excuse bad behavior, slap a diagnosis on it, and use it as a justification: “This is just how I am because I have this medical issue.” Don’t get me wrong—many people truly need understanding and medical support. But not everything requires a pill or a diagnosis. Sometimes, kids just need good old-fashioned discipline. On that one point, I can agree with the baby boomers.

Finding the balance between understanding, discipline, and open communication isn’t easy, but it’s worth striving for. Let’s figure it out together.

Why Open Communication Matters

As parents, we often wish we could read our kids’ minds. But the reality is, trust and open communication take time to build. Creating a safe space for your kids to share their thoughts and feelings helps them feel valued and understood. This foundation of trust not only strengthens your relationship but also equips them to face life’s challenges with confidence.

Matt and I have had countless conversations with our kids, trying to draw out their feelings—sometimes even about us. Hearing their honest thoughts about how we’ve handled a situation or made them feel is never easy. It’s a tough conversation for everyone involved. The kids may feel scared to share something harsh, worried about being ridiculed or punished for their feelings. Meanwhile, we parents have to sit there, biting our tongues, doing everything we can not to react defensively to the information we’re hearing.

For someone like me, who learns best by seeing something done, this makes parenting an even bigger challenge. There’s no example to follow, no perfect guide to refer to. And that’s why it truly feels like an experiment—an ever-evolving, humbling, and rewarding one.

5 Parent-to-Parent Tips for Encouraging Open Communication

1. Create a Safe Space for Honest Conversations

Children are more likely to open up when they feel safe and free from judgment.

  • Set aside regular one-on-one time to talk with each child.
  • Avoid interrupting or dismissing their feelings.
  • Use phrases like, “I’m here to listen, not judge.”

Parent to parent, we know that fostering open communication takes practice, but the effort is absolutely worth it when your kids feel safe sharing their thoughts with you. Our children should feel secure coming to us with their feelings, questions, or concerns. If they don’t, they may eventually turn to other sources for comfort or develop unhealthy coping mechanisms to manage their emotions. Creating that sense of safety now lays the foundation for trust and resilience as they grow.

Am I a licensed professional? Nope. I’m just a mom speaking from experience—someone who was once a child herself and is now navigating the adventure of raising her own.

2. Model the Behavior You Want to See

Kids learn by example, so show them what open communication looks like:

  • Share your own thoughts and feelings in age-appropriate ways.
  • Admit when you’re wrong and apologize sincerely.
  • Discuss family decisions openly to show respect for everyone’s input.

From one parent to another, modeling vulnerability can feel uncomfortable, but it shows your kids that it’s okay to be human. We may never receive apologies for the things that still sting when we think about them. But if our childhoods have taught us anything, it’s this: there are lessons in what we didn’t appreciate, and those lessons drive us to do better for our own children.

3. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Instead of questions that prompt yes-or-no answers, try these:

  • “What was the best part of your day?”
  • “How do you feel about what happened at school today?”
  • “What’s something you’re excited or worried about?”

Open-ended questions invite deeper conversations and create opportunities for your kids to express themselves freely, without fear of giving the “wrong” answer. Instead of shutting down dialogue with simple yes-or-no responses, these questions encourage them to explore their thoughts and feelings. It’s not just about getting them to talk; it’s about showing them that their opinions, fears, and dreams matter.

Questions like, “What was the best part of your day?” or “How do you feel about what happened at school today?” signal to your kids that you’re genuinely interested in their experiences and willing to listen without judgment. This approach fosters a sense of safety and trust, allowing them to open up more readily over time.

It also strengthens your connection as a family. When kids know they’ll be heard, they’re more likely to share not just the good but also the challenges they’re facing. This can lead to meaningful problem-solving discussions and teach them the value of open communication in all areas of life.

When it comes to our kids, Ethan is the tough nut to crack. Getting him to open up feels like solving a puzzle with missing pieces. Addison, on the other hand, is the complete opposite—she’ll happily share every thought and feeling, whether you asked for them or not!

4. Make Time for Family Meetings

Set up regular family meetings to discuss feelings, plans, or challenges as a group.

  • Keep the tone light and supportive, not punitive.
  • Encourage everyone, including you, to share their thoughts.
  • End on a positive note, such as celebrating small wins or planning a fun family activity.

Family meetings show your kids that their voices matter, creating a space where everyone feels valued and strengthening the parent-to-child connection.

We don’t have family meetings as often as we should, but when we do, they’re incredibly helpful! That said, I have to admit—hearing the words “Family Meeting” instantly takes me back to my childhood. For me, those words usually meant mom and dad had reached their limit, and it was time for everyone to sit down and hear about how bad we’d been and how we needed to do better. It wasn’t an open conversation; it was a lecture. Our thoughts and feelings weren’t always welcomed, and if they were, it often felt like our thoughts and feelings were invalid. To be honest, this is probably why I (Denise) have such a hard time communicating with Matt in intense situations.

I want to be clear—I’m not trying to paint a picture of a terrible childhood. My parents did their best, as all parents do. I simply want to point out that all parents, including Matt and me, make mistakes. Sometimes those mistakes are small, and we learn from them quickly. Other times, we don’t realize they were mistakes until it’s too late.

To be fair, there’s a time and place for that kind of family meeting. Matt and I have had to hold those tough conversations ourselves, and they serve an important purpose. But the memory of those “family meetings” from my own childhood comes with a lot of negative connotations. That’s why we aim to create a different kind of family meeting for our kids—one that invites open dialogue, mutual respect, and understanding, rather than fear or frustration. It’s not perfect, but it’s a step toward fostering the kind of connection we want to have as a family.

Matt also dealt with similar situations with his parents growing up. I can’t speak for him because I wasn’t there. But I was there to witness some of the ways his younger sister was parented. And it wasn’t always pretty. I’ve even been on the receiving end of correction from Matts mom early on in our marriage. Just constant reminders of how I don’t want to act toward my kids. But again, as I admitted early on, I too fail at times.

5. Be Patient and Consistent

Building open communication takes time. Some days your kids may talk nonstop, and other days they may give one-word answers.

  • Stay consistent in your efforts to communicate.
  • Celebrate the small moments when they open up.
  • Let them know you’re always there, no matter what.

Patience and consistency are the secret ingredients to fostering trust and strengthening family bonds. I know how cliché that sounds—trust me, I rolled my eyes at myself as I wrote that. Because, let’s be real, some days it’s easy to be patient and consistent, and other days it’s like calmly explaining algebra to a tween who’s dramatically proclaiming they’ll never use math in real life.

The Benefits of Open Communication

When open communication becomes part of your family dynamic, you’ll notice positive changes:

  • Your kids will feel more confident sharing their thoughts and emotions.
  • Family conflicts will be easier to resolve.
  • You’ll build a deeper understanding of each other, creating a stronger family bond.
  • You’re kids will actually want to spend time with you. Without force!

Conclusion: Building Stronger Bonds

From our chaotic parenting woes to yours, fostering open communication with your kids is a journey, not a destination. By creating a safe space, modeling openness, asking meaningful questions, and staying consistent, you’re building a foundation of trust that will last a lifetime. If you’ve ever watched a foundation being laid, it something that takes time, patience, knowledge, skills, and at times trial and error. It isn’t something that happens over night. So as you put these thoughts into practice, don’t get dissapointed if you don’t see immediate results!

If you’re ready to strengthen your family bond further, Check out our other posts on parenting tips and subscribe to our blog for more parenting advice from real life parents! Let’s navigate this journey together.

Message us on Facebook and/or TikTok for more relatable parenting advice and ideas to help foster communication in your family.

peace at home
Family Foundations

Creating Peace at Home: Turning Your House into a Sanctuary for Your Family

by Denise Wright

Introduction

Home should be more than just the place where we sleep, eat, and juggle the chaos of daily life—it should feel like a sanctuary. As parents, Matt and I know how challenging it can be to create peace at home, especially with kids, work, and an endless to-do list. But we’ve also learned that with a few intentional changes, it’s possible to build a space that feels calming, welcoming, and restorative for the whole family.

In this post, we’re sharing practical tips and insights from our own journey to make our home a place of peace. From managing the noise and clutter to creating moments of connection, these small changes can have a big impact on the way your family feels at home.

1. Start with Decluttering the Physical Space

It’s hard to feel peaceful when you’re surrounded by piles of stuff. One of the biggest things Matt and I have learned is that clutter isn’t just visual—it creates mental and emotional stress too.

We don’t have a Pinterest-perfect house by any means, but we’ve worked on minimizing the chaos by regularly decluttering. A great place to start is with the common areas: the kitchen, living room, and entryway. Once those spaces feel more open and organized, it’s amazing how much lighter the whole house feels.

💡 Practical Tip: Involve the kids in decluttering by turning it into a fun challenge. Who can fill a box of items to donate the fastest?

2. Prioritize Moments of Connection

Peace at home isn’t just about how a house looks—it’s about how it feels. And nothing creates a sense of calm like meaningful family connections. For us, this means carving out intentional time to connect with our kids, even if it’s just over dinner or playing video games with the kids after their schoolwork is completed.

Sometimes it’s as simple as turning off the TV and really listening to what the kids are saying. Other times, it’s planning a family movie night or taking a walk together. These small moments create a sense of belonging and stability that helps everyone feel more grounded.

3. Create Personal Spaces for Everyone

While we value togetherness, we’ve also learned that everyone needs a little personal space to recharge. For Matt, it’s his desk; for me, it’s a cozy corner with a comfy chair where I can game or work. The kids also have their own spaces where they can read, play, or unwind after a long day.

Having a designated spot for each family member to retreat to can work wonders for creating peace at home. It helps everyone recharge and prevents the whole family from getting overwhelmed by constant togetherness.

4. Add Calming Elements to Your Home

Sometimes, creating peace at home is as simple as changing the atmosphere. Adding soft lighting, calming scents, and cozy textures can completely transform the feel of a space.

We recently added a wax warmer to Matt’s desk that looks like a tiny fireplace, and it’s been such a simple but effective way to create a relaxing vibe. Whether it’s lighting a candle, playing soft background music, or investing in a fluffy throw blanket for the couch, these small touches make a big difference.

5. Establish a Routine That Works for Your Family

Chaos often sneaks into our home when there’s a lack of structure. While we’re not sticklers for a rigid schedule, having a flexible routine helps keep the day-to-day manageable and creates a sense of predictability for everyone.

For example, we’ve established simple morning and evening routines that help set the tone for the day and wind everyone down at night. Knowing what to expect takes the guesswork out of daily life and creates a foundation of peace.

💡 Practical Tip: Start small. Even a 5-minute family check-in at the end of the day can help everyone feel more connected and calm.

6. Model Peaceful Behavior

We’ve learned the hard way that our kids mirror what they see. If Matt and I are constantly stressed, snapping at each other, or rushing from one task to the next, that energy trickles down to the kids, fast.

Instead, we’ve been trying to model calm behavior (as much as possible). This means taking a breath before responding, using kind tones even when we’re frustrated, and showing the kids how we handle stress in healthy ways.

7. Celebrate the Small Wins

Creating peace at home is a process, not an overnight transformation. Celebrate the little victories along the way, whether it’s a decluttered corner, a smooth bedtime routine, or a day when everyone manages to stay calm and connected.

We’ve found that celebrating these small wins helps us stay motivated and reminds us why we’re making these changes in the first place—to create a home where everyone feels loved, supported, and at peace.

Conclusion: Building Peace at Home Takes Intention

Creating a home that feels like a sanctuary doesn’t mean having a perfectly decorated house or a stress-free life. It’s about making intentional choices that bring calm, connection, and joy into your space.

By decluttering, prioritizing family time, and adding little touches of calm, you can transform your house into a place where your family can recharge and grow together. Remember, peace at home isn’t about perfection—it’s about creating an environment where everyone feels safe, loved, and at ease.

What’s one step you can take today to create more peace at home? Let us know! And if you’re looking for more tips and insights, subscribe below to Our Family Experiment for updates and exclusive content.

Message us on Facebook and/or TikTok for more relatable parenting advice and ideas to bring more calm into your family life.

ideas for family
Family Foundations

Ideas for Building Resilient Kids: Strengthening Emotional Foundations for Your Family

by Denise Wright

Introduction

Raising emotionally strong kids can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. If you’re searching for ideas for your family to build resilience, create stronger connections, and help your kids face life’s challenges with confidence, you’re in the right place.

In this post, we’ll explore practical tips, real-life examples, and simple strategies to help your kids grow emotionally while strengthening your family bond. Because when kids learn to manage emotions and overcome obstacles, they don’t just bounce back—they thrive.

1. Creating a Safe Space for Emotions

Building emotional resilience starts with teaching your kids that their feelings are valid and welcome.

  • Listen First: Encourage your child to share what’s on their mind without jumping in to “fix” the problem. Sometimes, they just need to feel heard.
  • Model Emotional Awareness: When you’re frustrated, say things like, “I’m feeling upset right now, but I’m going to take a deep breath and calm down.” Kids learn resilience by watching us handle our own emotions.
  • Tools for Younger Kids: Consider a feelings chart for younger children to name their emotions, or perhaps a journal for older kids over the age of 7.

This is especially important in our household because our daughter Addison experiences a wide range of emotions on a regular basis. Every day, we’re learning a little more about how to help her regulate her feelings, process things that upset her, and prepare for situations that might trigger strong reactions.

Though she’s the loudest in our house and a constant chatterbox, Addison is also incredibly sensitive. She reacts strongly to certain noises, has specific preferences for clothing textures, and is very particular about the foods she eats. Understanding her unique needs has been a journey, but it’s teaching us so much about patience, empathy, and creating an environment where she feels supported.

2. Teaching Problem-Solving Skills

When life gets tough, kids need to know how to work through challenges rather than avoid them.

  • Encourage Independent Thinking: Next time your child has a problem, ask questions like, “What do you think we should do?” or “What are a couple of solutions you can try?”
  • Break It Down: Help kids tackle challenges step by step so they don’t feel overwhelmed.
  • Celebrate Effort Over Outcomes: Remind your kids that trying and failing is often how we grow the most.

✨ Practical Tip: Start a family mantra like “In this family, we try, learn, and try again!”

3. Prioritizing Connection in Your Family

Strong emotional bonds help kids feel secure enough to handle life’s ups and downs. In our family, we’ve found that creating these bonds doesn’t require grand gestures—it’s often the little moments of connection that make the biggest difference. Whether it’s sitting down together for a meal, laughing over a shared joke, or simply being present when emotions run high, these everyday interactions build a foundation of trust and love.

One way we’ve worked on strengthening these connections is by being intentional about how we spend time together. Activities like family game nights or taking time to really listen to what our kids are saying have become simple but meaningful ways to create stability and connection.

There are many ways to strengthen your family’s bonds, from creating special traditions to finding small ways to show support every day. These efforts, no matter how small, provide kids with the stability and security they need to navigate life’s challenges with confidence.

These small, intentional efforts don’t just make kids feel loved—they give them the emotional security they need to face challenges with confidence.

  • Family Traditions Matter: Whether it’s weekly family game nights or bedtime chats, routines build connection and consistency.
  • Spend One-on-One Time: Even 10-15 minutes of focused time with each child can make a big difference. Ask about their day, dream with them, or simply share a laugh.

4. Teaching Healthy Coping Strategies

One of the best ideas for your family is helping your kids learn how to manage stress and disappointment in healthy ways.

  • Breathe Through It: Teach your kids simple deep breathing exercises to calm their minds.
  • Physical Outlets: Encourage activities like walking, biking, or playing outside when emotions run high.
  • Create a Calm-Down Space: Set up a cozy corner with soft blankets, books, and stress relief tools such as a box of sensory fidgets for kids who need a break.

In the end, even adults sometimes need a moment to cool down and breathe before reacting or engaging. In fact, I’d go a step further and suggest that those who are quick to react at the drop of a hat likely didn’t have someone teach them healthier ways to cope with their emotions growing up.

I’ll be honest—I struggle with reacting before I think, and I’ve noticed my kids have picked up on that habit too. But the fact that I can acknowledge it gives me hope—for their future and my own. After all, the first step to solving any problem is recognizing that it exists.

5. Practicing Gratitude as a Family

Gratitude shifts the focus from what’s missing to what’s already good in our lives—building a positive, resilient mindset.

  • Family Gratitude Jar: Have each family member write down one thing they’re grateful for each week and place it in the jar. At the end of the month, read them together.
  • Gratitude Journals: Encourage kids to list three “good things” each night before bed.
  • Model Thankfulness: Share your own moments of gratitude out loud.

✨ Reminder: Resilience grows when kids learn to look for the silver lining, even on tough days.

6. Celebrating Small Wins Together

Resilience isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Celebrate the effort your kids put into growing, trying, and learning.

  • Call Out the Little Things: Did your child try something new, stick with a tough task, or handle a disappointment well? Celebrate it!
  • Create a Family Wins Jar: Write down victories big and small, from “finished my chores without complaining” to “I stayed calm when I felt frustrated.”

Matt and I created an eBook that dives deep into Celebrating the Wins (Big and Small) and is packed with great ideas to help you do just that. Want a copy? Subscribe to Our Family Experiment today, and we’ll send you the eBook for free! It’s our way of saying thank you for joining us on this journey.

Conclusion: Resilience Starts at Home

Fostering emotional resilience in your kids isn’t about having all the answers—it’s about showing up, offering grace, and creating space for them to learn, grow, and bounce back stronger. These ideas for your family can help you build a foundation of emotional strength that will carry your kids through the challenges life throws their way.

Remember, small efforts add up. Every time you connect with your kids, celebrate their progress, or model resilience in your own life, you’re equipping them with tools they’ll carry for a lifetime.

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Family Life

Balancing Work, Parenting, and Personal Time

by Denise Wright

Balancing work, parenting, and personal time often feels like a juggling act with no manual. As a mom, I know how overwhelming it can be to meet deadlines, keep the house running, and still carve out time for yourself. The truth is, we can’t do it all perfectly—but with a few strategies, we can create a rhythm that works for our families and ourselves.

Let me tell you, I’ve been there. Mid-thought on a work project, and suddenly, my kids, God love them, have the most pressing questions—always at the most inopportune times. Add to that living in someone else’s home, without your own space, and it feels like the chaos is magnified. It’s tough, but these experiences have taught me a lot, and I’m excited to share some of the ways we’re learning to balance it all.

1. Embrace the Power of a Schedule

Having a schedule isn’t just helpful—it’s essential. Start by blocking time for work, parenting, and personal care. Even a loose plan can make a big difference in managing the chaos.

This past Friday, Matt and I planned a date night. We sent the kids to my sister’s house for a sleepover so we could have an uninterrupted deep discussion about our budget and set goals for the next five years. It was a much-needed moment to recalibrate as a team. Thankfully, our trusty See It Bigger Planner kept everything organized because we had a lot to cover!

At the end of the day, having a plan helps reduce the stress of life’s inevitable surprises. A great plan gives you a sense of control in what often feels like uncontrollable circumstances. As we’ve learned in 5 Parenting Lessons We’ve Learned the Hard Way, flexibility is key—because even the best plans require adjustments.

2. Set Clear Boundaries

One of the biggest lessons we’re learning—and trying hard to implement—is setting boundaries between work and family time. This is not easy. When you work remotely or for yourself, it’s tempting for your family to see you at your computer and assume you’re available.

Communicating your work hours is critical. Let your family know when you’re working and when you’ll be fully present with them. And when it’s time to log off, honor that commitment. It’s not just about getting work done; it’s about showing your family that they are a priority, too.

3. Delegate and Accept Help

You don’t have to do everything. Get the kids involved with age-appropriate chores, and don’t hesitate to lean on your support system. For us, it’s a team effort. Matt and I divide tasks based on who’s available and best suited for them. The kids help, too—whether it’s cleaning their rooms or caring for the dogs, every little bit counts.

Sometimes, outside help is a lifesaver. Whether it’s a family member offering to babysit or a food delivery service like DoorDash, don’t be afraid to say yes when help is offered. You’re not failing by asking for assistance—you’re being resourceful.

4. Make Time for Yourself

This one is easier said than done, but personal time is critical. Whether it’s 10 minutes of journaling, a long shower, or pursuing a hobby, prioritize activities that recharge you.

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: you can’t pour from an empty cup. Prioritizing yourself isn’t selfish—it’s essential. The other day, I wasn’t feeling well, and we had a grocery pickup scheduled. Matt graciously offered to handle it for me. Normally, I’d push through, but I knew resting was the best choice for everyone.

If you don’t have a spouse or partner, reach out to a trusted friend or family member when you need help. And don’t underestimate the value of community—whether it’s a church group or an online parenting forum, support is always available if you’re willing to ask.

One thing I’ll add here, as someone who has been on the receiving end of being that trusted friend or family member, is this: don’t take that person for granted. A heartfelt “thank you” is a great start and far better than nothing, but consider going a step further. Just because they love you and want to help doesn’t mean they aren’t setting aside their own responsibilities to assist you. Show your appreciation in tangible ways to honor their generosity and the effort they’ve made to support you.

5. Celebrate Small Wins

Balancing work, parenting, and personal time isn’t about achieving perfection. It’s about celebrating the small wins that keep you moving forward.

When life feels overwhelming, it’s easy to overlook small accomplishments. But each goal reached—no matter how small—is progress. Whether it’s finishing a work project, sneaking in a quiet cup of tea, or getting the kids to bed on time, these moments matter. Acknowledging them reminds you that you’re doing enough, even when it doesn’t feel like it.

Conclusion

Finding balance isn’t about fitting everything into one perfect day. It’s about creating harmony over time. By planning, setting boundaries, and giving yourself grace, you can make space for work, family, and yourself without burning out.

You don’t have to be superhuman to be successful. Success doesn’t mean doing everything perfectly—it means showing up, giving your best, and not neglecting yourself in the process. YOU matter. And trust me, your family sees and appreciates all that you do, even on the days when you don’t feel like you’ve done enough.

How do you manage the juggling act of work, parenting, and personal time? Share your tips with us at [email protected] or Facebook and subscribe to our blog for more insights on navigating the chaos of family life.